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Woe-Is-Me

Discussion in 'Fun and Games' started by drwinchester, Nov 22, 2013.

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  1. drwinchester

    drwinchester Guest

    The ultimate in woe-is-me gameplay.

    To play, a situation will be given. For example: "My bicycle broke down on the way to work." The next user adds onto the situation but adds one element that makes the situation even more pathetic: "My bicycle broke down on the way to work and work's twenty-seven miles away in the snow." Next user may add something like "My bicycle, which was the last present my dead uncle gave me, broke down on the way to work ad work's twenty-seven miles away in the snow."

    Round one:

    No one came to my birthday party.
     
    #1 drwinchester, Nov 22, 2013
  2. Silver Sparrow

    Silver Sparrow
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom.
     
    #2 Silver Sparrow, Nov 22, 2013
  3. RainbowVomiter

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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom because she was busy screwing my (older) boyfriend.

    ((yes it's consensual))
     
    #3 RainbowVomiter, Nov 22, 2013
  4. drwinchester

    drwinchester Guest

    (And as for when to start a new situation, I think that' come when nothing more can be added)

    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom, because she was too busy screwing my (older) boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlor.
     
    #4 drwinchester, Nov 22, 2013
  5. RainbowVomiter

    RainbowVomiter
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlor which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school.
     
    #5 RainbowVomiter, Nov 23, 2013
  6. danball7

    danball7
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters.
     
    #6 danball7, Nov 23, 2013
  7. AuroraBorealis

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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me.
     
    #7 AuroraBorealis, Nov 23, 2013
  8. Coinshot

    Coinshot
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment.
     
    #8 Coinshot, Nov 23, 2013
  9. AuroraBorealis

    AuroraBorealis
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mom, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The the only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea.
     
    #9 AuroraBorealis, Nov 23, 2013
  10. danball7

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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhoea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration.
     
    #10 danball7, Nov 24, 2013
  11. AuroraBorealis

    AuroraBorealis
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one.
     
    #11 AuroraBorealis, Nov 24, 2013
  12. drwinchester

    drwinchester Guest

    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander.
     
    #12 drwinchester, Nov 24, 2013
  13. AuroraBorealis

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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me.
     
    #13 AuroraBorealis, Nov 24, 2013
  14. Hexagon

    Hexagon
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing.
     
    #14 Hexagon, Nov 24, 2013
  15. AuroraBorealis

    AuroraBorealis
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing. One night, I woke up with him sitting on my face.
     
    #15 AuroraBorealis, Nov 24, 2013
  16. drwinchester

    drwinchester Guest

    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing. One night, I woke up with him sitting on my face and he had a gastrointestinal virus.
     
    #16 drwinchester, Nov 24, 2013
  17. Hexagon

    Hexagon
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing. One night, I woke up with him sitting on my face and he had a gastrointestinal virus. I tried to scream, but he was suffocating me, and my life started flashing before my eyes.
     
    #17 Hexagon, Nov 24, 2013
  18. AwesomGaytheist

    AwesomGaytheist
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing. One night, I woke up with him sitting on my face and he had a gastrointestinal virus. I tried to scream, but he was suffocating me, and my life started flashing before my eyes. I woke up in Minnesota.
     
    #18 AwesomGaytheist, Nov 24, 2013
  19. AuroraBorealis

    AuroraBorealis
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing. One night, I woke up with him sitting on my face and he had a gastrointestinal virus. I tried to scream, but he was suffocating me, and my life started flashing before my eyes. I woke up in Minnesota, in February, it felt like my face was about to freeze off
     
    #19 AuroraBorealis, Nov 24, 2013
  20. danball7

    danball7
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    No one came to my birthday party, not even my mum, because she was too busy screwing my older boyfriend. The only venue I could book was a funeral parlour which was holding a ceremony for a kindergarten class which perished from food poisoning at the local elementary school, including my little twin sisters, who were the only ones who ever seemed to care about me. The funeral attendees ate all of my cake, thinking it was a post-funeral refreshment. The only thing I got to have was the punch, which gave me diarrhea. I ended up in hospital for a week with severe dehydration. They ran out of hospital rooms so I had to share one with a World War II vet who thought I was a Nazi commander. He kept trying to hit me with his cane and always threw his food at me, and tried to murder me in my sleep when he kept missing. One night, I woke up with him sitting on my face and he had a gastrointestinal virus. I tried to scream, but he was suffocating me, and my life started flashing before my eyes. I woke up in Minnesota, in February, it felt like my face was about to freeze off. It did. I lost my nose.
     
    #20 danball7, Nov 24, 2013
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