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quote book time!

Discussion in 'Fun and Games' started by Stevie J, Feb 13, 2008.

  1. Stevie J

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    here's a forum for quotes!
    put down your favorite ones, doesn't have to be a famous one. it could be something that a friend said that was really funny/awesome!

    quote: Babyboy (Taj): "then i'll move to canada...where i can pop my knee and get it fixed for free, and love whoever i want"
     
  2. Wolfbane

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    quote: from a fellow member of my airsoft team: SWAT ###### "if you have sex with an unwilling prostitute, is it rape or shoplifting?"
     
  3. Missy "this is an A and B conversation, C your way out of it"
    Theodore "Good, cuz I'm just fartin' Rainbows o'er here."
    me "hey rich WOMAN, what did you do with my panda's??
    Old Bus Driver "Make sure to learn alot today, 'why? so we dont have to drive a bus for a living?'"
    Shanda"Guess What" 'What?' "Seamen"
    My Bus Driver "OOO.. look at that tall Christmas tree. AHH!!! And all covered in that white stuff!!!"
    Cameren "TIME PARADOX, you changed the future... YOU CANT DO THAT!!!"
    me "That feels weird....... what are you doing?"
    Dad "We have the smell of death, and babies at the SAME TIME!!!"
    Suni "was it a REAL cow???"
    me "AHHH, its creepy... i like it"
    Jesse "If i could grow a beard,, i would look like Jesus"
    Bus Driver "who'd you lose a bet to?"
    Nichole "im a seaman"
    English Teacher "i thought you meant by a sparkle dog, by a dog with a sparkler shoved up its ass"
    Jesse "have fun getting a cow on the bus"
    Matt "I met this girl on E-BAY.. yeah,, she is gonna arive here any day now...."
    Jesse "Make like a tree and leave"
    Matt "Im tired of you saying my GF is fat.. i think i have to eat you now..."
    Kooper "Can it get ANY smaller?? 'HAHAHA.... thats what she said!'"
    Matt "IM GONNA KICK YOU IN THE DICK!"
    Me "Mom, im wet! '... Things you never want to hear from your son...' "
    Math Teacher "I am on my 'time'.. you should let me go to the bathroom"
    Dad "We just saw a deer commit suicide...... that was weird!!"
    KK "you cant see down my shirt, so nothing is going there"
    Science teacher "what is the meaning of life?"
    Dakota "i love the feeling of condoms...."
    Marynell "she bruised her tail bone while making sausages!"
    Me "i wouldnt be surprised if she had a few rug burns here and there...."
    Connor "OHHH!!! you just pulled the EMO CARD!!"
    Jeese "you have ANIME HAIR!"
    me "watching someone having sex in the dark with a glow in the dark condom, would be like watching strobe light action!"
    Dakota "i can spread my legs this far!"
    Cameren "damn you jesus, and other biblical names!! and YOU 23!!"
    Jesse "...And then pull it out in the middle of class??"
    Me "Jesse, what is the meaning of life? 'come closer... closer.... CLOSER........ cookies'"
    Cameren "But you are god!!" "YOU STOLE MY HAPPY!"
    Chey "Mountain Dew makes your penis small 'well ive been drinking it all my life and its a great size!'"
    Brady "what did i miss yesterday? 'she was all like unhuh, and i was all like uhhuh!' never mind..."
    Dakota "i fart glitter"
    Jessica "can i lick you 'no' okay" *lick*
    Sarah "how dare you raise from the dead"
    Jesse "you will never find a mounted fish with its mouth closed 'why is that' cause the car wash says so!"
    Peter "lightning storms turn me on"
    Jesse "i like to izzit!"
    Moriah "i had to put the dogs to sleep"
    Jesse "in the eyes of my kitty im something!!!
    Cerejena "you shall get a sex change"
    Brittany "OMG!! barbie is a bitch!!"
    Talia "AHHHHHHHH!!!!! 'what?' ohhh its nothing"
    Matty "lets make a porno!!!"
    Sean "im good at quickies"
    Mystery "LOAF KITTY!!!"
    Jensen " Dit verbaast. =] Zo schattig!!"
    Shanda "I made waffles. these ones have peanuts AND soap, in them..."
    Aaron "TOGA TOGA!!!" and "WE WILL RAPE YOUR CHURCHES AND BURN YOUR WOMEN"
    Jon "I have 3 words for you, Sexual Harassment Panda"
    Ashley "You shall be my new fluffy"
    Theodore "you have a problem son?'a little one'"
    me "WHO ARE OYU AND WHY ARE YOU ON MY CHOCOLATE MILK GET OUT MY CHOCOLATE MILK .........oh its just you ...well you can stay"
     
    #3 Monique_Massacre, Feb 13, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 13, 2008
  4. Brett

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    Dallas " Meat is not a treat when you eat the meat of another meat,.....animal.....thing....."

    Self "I bit the cheese stick ant the end exploded on me, but it was still pretty yummy" (I really did say that without knowing what I was saying,.......seriously)
    Stephanie "I eatted him..............sorry........I was hungry"

    My friend's aunt "It's funny because he doesn't have arms!!!"

    EatYourPeas18 " I'm gonna go puke a rainbow now..."
     
  5. KatoKumi

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    bvtsjm: "yeah, my pics make me flaccid too."

    ...Lololol.
     
  6. KazMaz

    KazMaz Guest

    Ok, got an old one over here for ya. It's from 'Call of the Wild' by Jack London.

    "Night came on, and a full moon rose high over the trees. Lighting the land till it lay bathed in ghostly day. And the strain of the primative remained alive and active. Faithfullness and devotion; things born of fire and roof were his. Yet he retained his wildness and wiliness. And from the depths of the forest, the call still sounded."
     
  7. shaun

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    "I never met a man I didn't like" Will Rogers
    Gay? I think so
     
  8. sngl

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    Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.

    :lol:
     
  9. llenadepecas

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    "I've realised that I'm in love. It's all there is, like a powerful raw beast crouching under all the games."
    One of my favourite quotes. From a book.
     
  10. pirateninja

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    From my friend, "How long is happy hour?"

    And from another, "I'm not stylish but I'm not a disaster either."
     
  11. ppreston9

    ppreston9 Guest

    HARRY POTTER

    "To the well organized mind, death is but the next great adventure." dumbledore


    "Humans have a knack for choosing precisely the things that are worst for them." dumbledore

    "And now Harry, let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure." dumbledore (one of my faves)
     
  12. Bromptonrocks

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    Here's one but not from a book. It's from a conversation (and no offence intended to who said it).

    After a looooooong MSN session filled with innuendo I said,

    "Don't you just love innuendo?" The other guy replied, "Who's he? Is it someone on EC?"
     
  13. Atom

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    Definitely anything and everything Chuck Palahniuk. He speaks so much truth and in such a beautifully presented way. His literature is like scripture to me, seriously (if you ever actually read the quotes, you may be thinking I'm a pessimistic maniac, but hey, at least I'm not you, right?). I just can't get enough.

    But from some books I've read of his, here are just a few...

    "Masochism is a valuable job skill."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Choke

    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

    "We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

    "When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

    "All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters, 1999

    "Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everybody I've ever known."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters, 1999

    "The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters, 1999

    "The only reason why we ask other people how their weekend was is so we can tell them about our own weekend."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters, 1999

    "Your birth is a mistake you'll spend your whole life trying to correct."
    Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters, 1999


    I couldn't find any from "Haunted" nor many from "Choke"
    I seriously have brain orgasms when reading his books.
     
  14. lostinthought9

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    most of my favorite quotes come from xena like the one in my sig, and...

    "...life is eternal, it has no beginning and no end, the loving friends we meet on our journey return to us time after time, we never die becuase we were never really born..." -Gabrielle

    "you can't have love without hate, you cant have peace without violence, and you certainly cant have forgiveness without anger..." -Xena

    "a good commander looks beyond what their opponent is doing, to see if their's a deeper strategy..." -Athena (from the series xena)

    "all things must come to an end, why should we [the gods] be any exception?" -Hera [to zeus] (from the series xena)
     
  15. goodisgood

    goodisgood Guest

    Don't know who said these but:

    "She gave him a look you could pour on a waffle."

    and one of my ultimate favorites:

    "You can lead a horticulture, but you can't teach her to think."
     
  16. pirateninja

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    Trust a nitwit society like this one to think that there are only two categories - fag and straight. ~Gore Vidal

    Homosexuality is god's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't burdened with children. ~Sam Austin

    If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work: "Hello. Can't work today, still queer." ~Robin Tyler

    You know what they say: You can't teach a gay dog straight tricks. ~Trey Parker & Matt Stone, South Park
     
  17. Astaroth

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    "You say tomato, I say fuck off" - Queer As Folk

    "Masturbation: Comes In Handy" - Unknown .... (think about it :wink: )

    "The moment you reach the top of your game, you come to realize you're only playing T-ball" - Unknown

    "Sanity is a one-trick pony" - The Tick

    "Somewhere in Texas, there's a village missing it's idiot" - Bumper Sticker

    "You say 'gay' like it's a bad thing" - Me :slight_smile:

    "Where's the head!?" - My mom, while staring at tail of a dinosaur in a museum.

    "That must be it's Adam's Apple." - My mom again, now staring at the dinosaur's anus. Oh yes, I shit you not!

    "I'm going to hang you in the stairs." - My dad... I still don't get that one to this day.

    "Pitiful mortal. All your hopes end here. And your meaningless existence with it." - Final Fantasy X

    "I'm going to live forever or die trying." - Unknown

    "Live life happily and without restraint. Unless you're into S&M. Then by all means, use restraints." - Margaret Cho

    "Don't mix your old gay with your new gay." - Margaret Cho

    Person 1: "I've always relied on the kindness of strangers."
    Person 2: "Well, that's a stupid thing to do!"
    ~ Angels In America

    "Are you gay, bisexual, and transgender?" - My mom again.

    "There were these two gay boys at my high school that were fearless. They were the epitome of gay strength. They were like... Crouching Drag Queen, Hidden Faggot!" - Margaret Cho

    "Your life is the Universe's way of making a joke." - Frenzy

    "CAUTION: Road may be wet during rain." - A sign

    "There's no "U" in "TEAM"" - My dumbass old manager

    "Well, that's a whore of a different color!" - Me (subtle Wizard of Oz reference: +10 points)
     
  18. Ty

    Ty Guest

    Im As Straight As A Button! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: - Me to a group of friends when they were questioning my sexuality.