Okay the title is a bit extreme, but I'm a bit frustrated and as per usual my first reaction is to take it out on myself. But no, my face is intact. I won't get all Harvey Dent up in here. Anyway, school is starting! :***: And I’m here to talk about a couple things, one is my own just little internal war I’m having, and the other is this other problem I have with idiot boys. So any FtMs have issues with boys? I'll be blunt. I'm busty. I got the kind of chest that makes binding impossible, and quite frankly painful. And sadly for me, there's a nice happy little stereotype about how girls with huge tits are loose and down for just about anything. I have had horrible problems with guys who will not take no for an answer. LEAVE ME ALONE. But no, I got a "boyfriend" and then suddenly I have more guys than before on me? DID YOU TAKE IT AS A CHALLENGE!? Apparently. I need to practice an extremely deep voice, so I can't start looking at them and saying with a straight face "I have a penis", and watch as they back away disgusted. That would solve that, maybe. VENTING EVERYWHERE. Internal war, screw it should I go back to brainwashing myself? I feel like that would be so much easier. Just shut-up Charlie, you were born a girl, go act like a girl. Why are you making it complicated. Oh what's that? You're not happy as a girl? Well tough purple people eaters, honey. Society wants you to wear skirts, and buy panties, and society wants you to use the girls rest room, society this, society that, human culture over there, why bother fighting when you could so easily conform. Why do I bother? Isn't that the whole thing with being non-op? Forever female on the outside. I'm handsome to my girlfriend, and that's what has gotten me this far. She thinks the best of me, somehow. I seriously consider going back to saying I'm a girl, and beating Charlie away, because despite all the joy i get from seeing myself as male...it's going to be a long time until I can be Charlie. I just needed to vent. Frustrating and scary. I'm sure someone's been here before.:goodevil:
Boys never bothered me. I put on this freaky goth persona, I still have a strong pull towards the goth aesthetic, but most people were put off by it. I learned in my final year of high school a lot of people actually fancied me, but nobody wanted to approach me. Mind you, I like boys, but straight boys I did not want to try and handle. As far as being non-op goes. I'm pre-everything, and too familiar with the day to day struggle. How often do I wish I could just be a girl the way everyone expects...I'm glad I wasn't born a guy though, as tough as it is. I think being born female has made me sensitive and understanding to things I wouldn't have otherwise understood like I do if I was born all male.
I know how you feel. I'm busty as well and apparently good looking as a girl. But I hate it. I get hit on soo much by guys because I'm pre everything so I still don,t pass as a guy. And it's annoying as hell everytime. I don't like attention like that at all, especially since they treat me as a girl. Maybe if they treated me as a guy, i wouldn,t care as much. And I think what you mean about guys not taking no as an answer. I started talking to a guy, just as a friend. I even said I have a boyfriend, but he hit on me a few times anyway. And he wouldn't stop being a creep. So I stopped answering his texts and blocked him. But that night, he kept texting me anyway, trying to get me to answer. He even called me the next day, like he couldn't get the hint. So I know what you mean. I'm not saying that all guys are assholes, but a lot of the guys I've met are and they're creepy and annoying. I really hate getting hit on. If you ever need anyone to talk to, feel free to talk to me.
