So I've been wondering something for a while now: As a young child, as far back as I can remember (to about 5 years of age), I used to enjoy typically female activity. I enjoyed make-up, women's clothes, dolls -- and when I would play with "action figures" with my step-brother I would always use a female or gender neutral character, often "marrying" the male dolls. I remeber wishing I was a girl (very early childhood) and even up to middle school I preferred to play the female characters in video games. Now, my sexuality was realized by about 5th grade, and about freshman year, when I was accepting my self as gay, my more feminine tendencies began to vanish (granted I still like dress-up and make-up, thanks to drama.) Is this sort of early development behavior common, or was my sexuality "echoing to the past?" Is there such thing as being transgender in early childhood, only to become cisgender when one is sexually capable?
Based on the research, I'm pretty sure that gay men are statistically more likely to have been gender non-conforming as children, though not sure about lesbians. But childhood behavior doesn't necessarily mean anything with regard to a child's future sexual orientation or gender identity. Gender non-conforming children can still grow up to be regular old heterosexuals. And perfectly "normal" children can grow up to gay or trans.
It's not uncommon for gay boys to "want to be girls", for the cultural advantages, but if it hasn't been a continued need, I wouldn't worry about it right now. There are late onset transsexuals, who have not had symptoms as children, and a few of these formerly identified as gay men and women. I don't think you were transgendered, just from what's been said. There's a world of difference between "wish you were a girl" and "were a girl (just in the wrong body)". For the "obvious" TS, there's little to no doubt what gender they are, regardless of what others might say.
At its most basic, a huge percentage of gay men had stereotypically "girly" interests as children... and many knew as early as 3 or 4 that they were gay, though they didn't label it as such. I think we're overcomplicating it if we call it "wanting to be girls" or "being transgender." I think at a more basic level, children don't understand the concept of gender as separate from biological gender, so a gay kid just knows that he likes "girly" things more than "boy" things. I don't think it's anything more than that.
I was similar to yourself, Saint Otaku. All of my friends growing up were girls, and I loved playing with "girls' toys" (except baby dolls, as I don't like children). I also wanted to be a girl, as I felt uncomfortable around other guys, and didn't like the male social role I was suppose to adopt. I remember playing make-believe games with girls, silly things like pretending to get married, I'd always make one of the girls pretend to be the guy, and I'd be a girl (despite being the only actual guy in the group). I tried to be less obviously "girly" due to fear of bullying later on, and as my attraction towards guys became more obvious, I began being more interested in masculinity and being around other guys. I can still be fairy camp sometimes, and I still have 0 interest in most "guy activities" (watching sports, drinking beer and mud wrestling, or whatever "guys" do). I'm probably just more nerdy now.
I've had a similar experience. Used to dress as a boy, insist on being called a boys name and only played with boys. In short I wanted to be male. But, when I became about 15 I slowly became comfortable and happy being female, now I'm quite girly!
Yes, in fact the majority of people who show gender variant behavior at a young age (3-10) eventually grow up to identify as a gay cis individuals rather than transgender individuals. How we grow into ourselves is a very interesting question but its definitely not a given that showing gender variant behavior as a young child necessitates being trans later in life, in fact its more likely you will just be gay. This if from a study that I can find if anyone cares.
