1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Genderqueer? Genderfluid? Or just... crazy :-P

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Ralph, Oct 9, 2013.

  1. Ralph

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2013
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    near Denver
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Family only
    Hi! I'm a crossdresser from way back, before there was an internet where I could find others like me. For years I thought I was gay, and/or meant to be a woman. Well, it only took one encounter to make me 100% sure I wasn't gay. And it took one sexually active relationship with a college girlfriend and then marital bliss (different girl) for me to be 100% sure I really, *really* like being a man.

    And yet... here I sit in my soft dress in my office, and when I go out I'll have the obligatory t-shirt-and-jeans uniform on over my nylon panties, knee-high stockings if it's warm or tights and leotard if it's cold. I'll go to bed in a cozy satin nightgown. Maybe I'll watch a romantic comedy and be in tears before it's over. Maybe I'll spend a couple of hours in Second Life, where I can create and wear beautiful dresses that I could never afford in real life and safely go out dressed however I want without worrying about being lynched -- or even present as fully female just because I like the way it changes how people respond to me. I sure won't have much to discuss with most of my male friends, who (in this rural ranching community) only talk about hunting and trucks and football and the evil liberal gun control policies they will go to their deaths to oppose. Go Broncos! Make lots of, uh, whatever scoring mechanism you use!

    And yet... I care nothing for my appearance. I rarely shave my beard off, never shaved any other part of me (well, I tried shaving my legs once but I clogged the plumbing for six miles around and decided it was more trouble than it was worth), rarely if ever comb my hair, pick my nose and scratch the family jewels in public. I leave my dirty clothes wadded up on the floor -- there's my favorite princess-style lavender ballgown mixed in with t-shirts, jeans, silk blouses, and nightgowns. I love first person shooter games where I blow my son and his friends away with assault rifles and hand grenades. I love stupid violent movies with lots of car chases and explosions. I'm the only guy I know who can fix and use both a computer and a sewing machine.

    Mostly, I'm looking for others like me. There are a few -- over at Skirt Cafe, over at Fashion Freestyler (formerly known as Casual Crossdresser) -- but I'm the only active particpant at either place, posting once a week or less. I've tried numerous TG and CD sites. The TG sites are really exclusively TS, talking about hormone therapy and voice changing and SRS. The CD sites are more focused on being "part-time women" -- how to pass, how to tuck, choosing a girly name, and how one's femme side expresses a completely different personality when dressed than when drab. Or the fetish stuff where people will post 800 times a day about how they had to rent another warehouse to hold their expanding panty collection.

    Not that there's anything wrong with any of that, of course. It just ain't me. So I'm here looking for others who consider themselves men but with... a nonstandard flair.

    I see someone else posted coming from the other side... xydriek, I know exactly how you feel!
     
  2. laut

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2013
    Messages:
    137
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Cardiff
    Out Status:
    A few people
    There's a blog that might appeal to you: His Black Dress

    It's about a guy who identifies as male, but likes wearing women's clothing.
     
  3. Ralph

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2013
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    near Denver
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Family only
    How could I leave HBD out? Yes, I also visit that site occasionally but it has the same problem as the others -- no community activity at all. Mostly he just posts pictures of his "outfit of the day".

    Thanks for the reminder :slight_smile:
     
  4. bethcgy

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2013
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Red Maple Leaf Country
    Gender:
    Male
    Now there are two of us :slight_smile:
    Or is that four?
     
    #4 bethcgy, Oct 23, 2013
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2013
  5. ERA

    ERA
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2014
    Messages:
    45
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northern Colorado
    Gender:
    Androgyne
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Ralph,
    Lately, I've been calling myself an androgyne because I'm a guy who kinda wishes he was a girl, but also doesn't want to not be a guy.
    I've tried cross dressing a few times, but I do get upset when I see my hairy gorilla chest sticking out of my wife's blouses and dresses that I try on. I love the way heels make my legs and butt look... except for all the yeti hair. :frowning2:
    I can also relate to not having anyone to talk to. I probably live relatively near you and work in road construction, which tends to attract those same conservative types.