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Warming up to being queer...but am I Trans as well?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by localfwbguy, Oct 17, 2013.

  1. localfwbguy

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    Hi, thanks for checking out my post. I'ma try to keep it brief as possible.

    Basically, I am 24yo and a guy. I have always been "Straight" in my head, or so I thought. Anyways, I am a naturally masc guy, not macho or douchie just not effeminate. I have however always had a thing for older, mature men. Even when I was kid, I would pick out men who seemed like my ideal "dad". Anyways, this admiration got sexualized when I hit puberty and after just getting out of a 2 year hetero relationship I think I am ready to try a relationship with a mature man, whom I dig sexually.

    Sorry, trying to get to it! I can remember now, sometimes imagining being a girl as a kid. Even now, I sometimes imagine being a girl. I'll think, "If I was a girl I'd wear that hippy skirt, or grow my hair like that, or just be awesome and hot, a total badass, etc". I don't know if it's because I find some women very pleasing to the eye, like women in general and these are some traits of girls I like or what.

    I tried on a pair of panties one time as a kid, and got caught...super awkward. So I never really did it again. I do feel extra sexy in briefs though, because 90% of the time I wear boxer briefs and I have a fetish fro briefs on older men. I have also imagined being a girl, because it would be way easier to have sex with good looking straight men whom I tend to dig. I even wrote a sexual story in my teens through the perspective of a girl.

    For the most part, I like being a guy. I can get some "feminine" insecurities from time to time. Like, lovehandles for instance. But for the most part I dig being my male self. I guess I've just been exploring "The Queer World" more, and the "Am I trans?" question popped in my mind. I couldn't imagine living as a trans woman in real life though, I suppose I may consider "dressing" if my partner wanted it or something. but no shaving... can't do razor burn lol!

    Look forward to hearing from ya'll.
     
  2. BookDragon

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    If I'm being completely honest, and remember it's not my place to say for certain if you are or aren't, but it really sounds like you aren't.
     
  3. gravechild

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    Again, it's not about what stereotypical gender qualities you have (there are plenty of "feminine" men and "masculine" women, for example), or who you're attracted to, but what you feel comfortable identifying and seeing yourself as. There are plenty of masculine, heterosexual men who cross dress in secrecy, for example, and while they don't consider themselves anything other than just that, they too fall under the transgender umbrella.

    You say you've wanted to be a girl, but why? Was it for perceived social freedom to express yourself and not be judged harshly for it? We live in a world of extreme double standards, where women can wear pants daily without anyone blinking an eye, but a man wearing a dress or a skirt will likely face harassment and possibly violence. I also don't see how older men play into this at all.

    Not all gender-variant children grow up to be LGBT, and not all LGBT shown stereotypical signs as children. What *I* see is someone who is making a connection between something that happened when they were younger, and a common question in the questioning stage. It's nothing out of the ordinary, and what I've shared so far is going only from what I know of you from this post. You seem like just another guy to me.
     
  4. localfwbguy

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    Thanks E, appreciate it! I figure with all this new self discovery why not ask?? Cheers

    ---------- Post added 17th Oct 2013 at 05:29 AM ----------

    Gravechild, thank you for your response. I get what your saying, about stereotypes and how that does not apply to anything. Kinda like labels to I suppose.

    I suppose, I have thought Before I would make a pretty kewl girl. Like if my mind was suddenly transplanted into a female body. I think it may be because for a long time I just had an overall shitty view of myself, anything would be better ya know. But I suppose when I am really honest about it, outside of the occasional thought of being a female..I really have no desire to do the work getting there. I guess its like.."well if I was, it could be kewl but since I am not that is kewl too". Not sure if that makes since or not. I think overall I am comfortable being male 100% of the time, just have the occasional thought.. Cheers! :slight_smile:
     
  5. BookDragon

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    Never hurts to make sure :grin: