So I'm still trying to figure myself out. The good news is that I found myself a date for next week That's about the only good news I have though. I still haven't accepted myself which I know is a pretty big part of this process. I know I'm not the only guy who has had these feelings or gone through this, I'm not that arrogant or naive. Now though I've started having fantasies about wearing girls clothing, specifically underwear. I will admit that I borrowed my best friend's panties at one point and tried them on, washed them afterward and repeated when I was alone. I moved out of there though and I'm back to fantasizing. I was walking through the mall the other day and even found a Wonder Woman costume that i almost stopped to look at and pick up thinking that I could try it on, make myself look/feel sexy. I have only told two people about this so far. Two female friends. One says that I should find a female friend to go with me when buying underwear (I'm not brave enough to do such things) and the friend who I tried on her panties (I didn't tell her I tried them on for obvious reasons but told her I fantasized about wearing woman's underwear in general). I'm just confused at this point on where to go from here. I'd really just like to know who I am, figure myself out and live my life. I keep a calm exterior but I'm definitely confused on the inside...
Ask one of them to come with you to buy underwear. Buy some, wear it. See how you feel. You might just 'feel sexy' or get some sort of sexual thrill from wearing them. You might feel nothing. You might wonder feel compelled to grab a skirt, grow out your hair and grab at your chest wishing your boobs would hurry up and grow even though you know they won't! There's nothing wrong with experimenting with the idea as long as you don't force yourself into doing something you're not comfortable with. If you find you just want to wear the underwear and nothing else, don't force yourself to go further!
Sadly they don't even live in the same zip code as me. Where I am right now I feel like I'm on my own since I haven't come out to a lot of people geographically close to me. All my closest friends know I'm bi and only the two I mentioned know about the underwear. :/
Sadpy I'm low on funds to begin with. I found some decent ones I wqnt at Victoria's Secret but since I live with my aunt and uncle it would be hard to explain tha t package
I'm thinking less victorias secret and more multi-pack from...I dunno, walmart or something? Sorry I don't know much about American shops! At least that way the package is easy to explain
Don't feel weird, because lots of guys like to wear women's underpants. Back when I lived in my home town I had a friend who got turned on by wearing diapers. It is called adult infantalism or something like that. Anyway he saw a show on Phil Donahue about adult babies that gave him relief to know he was not the only one. Just like when that guy told me I was trans, then I looked it up and found out he was right and I was not crazy but in fact other people were just like me. It was total relief! So take comfort in that it is ok to enjoy lace underwear. So the direction for you to go is to embrace who you are and roll with it! Do what comes natural and you can't go wrong because you will be happy. People will accept you and those who don't, can just move on and make way for someone who will.... I don't have to dress as a woman to be one, I simply am one. I do love to dress as one but with age it has become harder to pass because of my body size and shape. Regardless of this I found a man who sees her when he looks at me, and he fell in love with her and we are living happily ever after. How rare it must be for a straight man to fall in love with a woman who looks like another man and make love to her, embrace her, and enjoy life with her knowing most would call him gay wrongly? So I see no reason you can't find someone who will have fun dressing you up to whatever extent of women's cloths you desire and have fun doing it together. In time you will be able to buy lots of women's clothing, and I am quite sure you are sexy in someone's eyes! Good luck on your quest of self discovery! June
Thank you I know I'm not the only gut out there that experiences this. I just want to fully discover who I am so I can move on, find that special someone and have my happily ever after. Right now it is just a matter of working out ky confusion.
So in an update: I tried to buy myself a new set of undergarments. Went to a couple different stores, looked, and moved on, I just couldn't bring myself to grab them, bring them to the counter and pay for them. Even if I tried to tell people that they were for my "girlfriend." So I came home and looked at Walmart and couldn't bring myself to grab them. I got to the part of checking out where I had to put my card info in and couldn't do it. Mainly because I didn't have the money for them. Well, I started chatting with my first ex and she was extremely supportive of me. As a birthday present, she said she was going to buy me a couple pairs of panties and a couple bras to go with them! I'm way too excited for this but yeah, I'm insanely excited...
In another update I finally worked up the nerves to buy myself some women's underwear. Some very cute Wonder Woman panties and a bra. The bra was a sexy red thing but it was WAY too small. So I returned it and got a bigger bra which is still too small but I think it's big enough that if I sewed some velcro on it so I can get it to fit around me I enjoy it, gives me a bit of a sexual feel but there's something else to it. I can't really place the feeling it's not a BAD feeling, it's just, new, different, and good I think. I still want to go to a therapist because I definitely feel like I need to talk to a professional. I want to get comfortable enough that I can go out at some point in a casual girl outfit and relax with friends but I'm a ways from that and just have the underwear to start out with. But hey, it's something right? I will say that tonight I tried to tape my penis under me. It felt different but I didn't mind it. It was weird. I know, that's probably TMI but yeah....I felt like sharing.
So I'm still trying to work things out for myself. Found a pretty cheap therapist I plan on calling on Monday (Hopefully) to set up an appointment to start talking things out. I went out on my very first date tonight with a guy I met on an app. It went ok, very sweet guy who paid for dinner, but I just didn't feel any attraction to him. After the date I went to Walmart and bought myself another bra and a 3pack of thongs for $5.00 I'm wearing a bra and gstring now but I know that doesn't necessarily make me a girl. When I woke up this morning though I felt exceptionally feminine. I don't know, I guess I'm just talking hoping that everything will align and I'll figure things out. It...Hasn't worked yet. Any advice, or suggestions? The more I try to figure things out the more confused I get. Any help would be greatly appreciated... Not that it matters but I took a Kinsey test (it was a test I found on Google when I googled Kinsey test) and I was rated a 3. But yeah...Help? Please?
