Gender dysphoria and self-harm/suicide?

I may not know what it's like to be born as the wrong gender, but I can pretty much relate to everything else with the exception of self harming.

I lived in a complete hell for the first 17 and a half years of my life, and became really suicidal. I thought I would be miserable all my life, and that I would never have a happy ending, but things can and will get better, but you have to fight to keep going and survive, and trust me, I know how hard that can be. I use to think about suicide every minute of everyday, but if you give up now, that means that everything you have been through all your life, all that pain and suffering was for nothing. I had no one, not even a site like this to help, so you already have better odds then I had because you found this site and a girl who loves you and that you love back. I know it's tough, and that there will be days when you feel like your at the very bottom of hell, but you owe it to yourself to survive. There have been many transgendered and pansexuals that have lived happy and successful lives. There is no reason why you shouldn't be one of them.

And what you said about seeing things that make you feel different, so what. No matter what gender, race, sexuality, or anything else a person is, everyone is different. You shouldn't see your differences as a bad thing, you should see them as what makes you unique. I know that sometimes it can be more comfortable to blend in with everyone else, but I think everyone has a hard time blending in at times when they wish they could. Just hang in their friend, and try not to cause yourself anymore harm. Never make yourself to be your own enemy. Trust me on that. Also, maybe get a hobby or two to take your mind off things. Being alone with only your thoughts when in as dark of a place as your in can be suicide in itself. I know that all to well.

Just hang in there, and let me know if you want to talk. Im pretty good at solving problems (well at least other peoples problems). Good luck friend.

 

Have you spoken to a doctor about your gender feelings?

If its as bad as you say it is, you really ought to! (*hug*)

 

I completely get how ur feeling man. My parents arent christian but they are still really uncomfortable with it. I know it probably doesn't help but you aren't alone. Don't give up.

 

Hey, I know where you're coming from on both being trans, and self-harm. My parents are very religious themselves and don't know I identify as male, and I don't want them to know. As for dysphoria, it downright sucks. So many things make me dysphoric, it drives me insane, but know that you cannot give up. I am currently in therapy for self-harm of three years, and after awhile, it just doesn't help like it use to. I think about suicide all the time, but I go on, and I have to suffer two more years with my parents before I can move away from them and become myself and it kills me to think about how long it will take, but in the end it will all be worth it. I know parents can be so incredibly overbearing and a lot of them are very close minded, or hats the idea of their child being trans, I know mines do, but you can't let them ruin you. You have to live for you, for you to one day become your true self. Hurting yourself won't help at all, and neither will killing youreself. Life is hard, and always will be unfortunately, but you can make it through, don't let it win. In the end, you should be the one coming out on top. If you need to talk to someone, just send me a message, maybe I can be of some help.

 

I'm a Christian to and know how it feels but instead of cutting yourself and being down be greatful for what you have, Atleast you have a girlfriend in your life I don't even have a gf, So instead of looking at what you don't have look at what you do have, You aren't alone I know the feeling

 

I avoided cutting for yearssss because I grew up always finding my mom's razors and hating her for it. SO there is an extra layer of guilt there.

But lately I am self harming again... ugh. It's not my gender issues but... they probably don't help...

I am going to try my best to not do it again and I hope you can too OP... it doesn't help you only hurts... I hope you can find a better outlet. ((hugs)) and be well

 

Getting passed and coping with dysphoria is tough. It's easier said than done, but I know you'll find a way to cope. As someone with depression and who had a history of self-harm, I know how tough that can be. Like with anything else, you can learn to live with your mental illness and not let it overrun you. It just takes some time.

My family is Christian, but they're the casual type. Not one for going to church unless there's a wedding or ceremony we're invited too. Still, with that said, their stance on me being a transgender queer person is hard to pinpoint. I don't know if they're accepting and supportive, unaccepting or apathetic about it. But, I do hope they'll come around and I hope your parents do the same as well. My fears about my family affected my mental health a lot, probably more than my dysphoria. I really do hope your family comes around or you keep a level head on things. I'd hate to see you where I was for a while because of my family situations.

Do your best to find an alternative outlet for dealing with things since self-harm isn't the answer. If you google self harm alternatives, you'll find tons of different things you can do. One thing I did was I drew marks on myself with sharpie where I wanted to burn or scratch and that helped me a bit, same goes for holding ice and running my arms under cold water to name a few.

Stay strong!