How do you deal with your body image when it suddenly shifts and you look like a monster to yourself? Like really scary... or obese or some other messed up distorted feature. This has always been a pretty toxic combo for me. Ugh. I am fortunate in that I don't worry about passing/not passing issues just because it has never been a problem but still, my body image struggles to stay OK for more than a day or so esp. if I take photos or something. I feel like there is nothing to anchor me too a healthy body image especially if I am really depressed or splitting which is often. I don't know, can anybody relate?? Just putting this out there. Just kind of sad about it... sorry.
I am not sure, perhaps not looking into a mirror could help? By the body image you mean your real body (like if you gain weight) or your feelings about it?
Well I know my appearance is actually okay... but how it looks to me shifts a lot, one minute I think I look normal but then suddenly I think I look like a gigantic monster. I mean I really look physically different to myself.
You know the feeling when you overlook the crowd? Or when you passes by a stranger and you kind of notice how they look, but in a minute you are not sure what they wore and what color their hair was? Would you manage to learn to do that on your bad days? To look at your body this way? To not focus on it? It took me several months, but yeah, that's what I do.
Hmmm, that is a good idea. I have a habit of obsessing over the mirror and trying to get my appearance just right before going out. It usually takes me 2 hours to get ready and I am looking in the mirror a lot then. But maybe I can just focus less on the whole picture and just on doing what I need to do to get ready.
Yes, try to focus on the clothes, if that doesn't trigger anything. Like tailors, you know. They don't care about your hair, they focus on the sleeve... Or those body painters I bet they don't care much that their model is naked, they focus on their work.
We don't live our lives as airbrushed models on glossy paper in artfully lit galleries. We exist between moments, and in those moments we are only human. Even the most physically perfect among us have our awkward, ugly moments, but that's part of being a human. Re-watch Disney's Beauty an the Beast and note how different the Beast looks depending on the scene: During the wolf attack he is absolutely enormous, but in the healing scene afterwards with Belle, he is barely a few times her size. Disney did it according to the needs of the scene, but please don't do that to yourself. You're not supermodel, nor are you a beast: you're human, beautiful as you are and beautiful as you are now. Learn to be more compassionate to yourself.
Oh, I never noticed that about the movie. I actually wanted to watch Beauty and the Beast again recently so maybe I will. I definitely do that to myself but I'm trying. It's hard to forgive myself if I feel like I look ugly that day and hard to be okay with going out. The other day I wore a frumpy ponytail because my layers kept falling out of a bun and the world didn't crash down, though I worried about it all day. Thank you for your lovely perspective. I will try to remember what you said next time.
