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Trouble Fitting In

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by twospiritlycan, Oct 26, 2013.

  1. I attended a transwoman support meeting in the past two days. I felt scared being there because I didn't know what to do, how to act, or anything. I had feelings sure about myself, but some people there made me like questioning myself again and I feel lost again.

    I do feel like I want to be a girl, but I'm scared about going through with it because of hearing other stories and such. It was my first time being there and I felt awkward about everything.

    What is wrong with me?
     
  2. AtheistWorld

    AtheistWorld Guest

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    I kinda felt that way too upon coming out - It was just hesitation to start living part of my life as a woman, the doubts, the fear, the expectations all marred my acceptance of myself. I kept thinking I could never look presentable as a woman, and it made me so reluctant to feminize myself.

    It was especially hard, because I didn't and still don't want to give up my man half, and while I am passable now, it was such an intimidating hurdle, but it's easier the more you practice and it's NOT undoable. For you the transition should be much less stressful and nuanced, and if I can overcome my own fears and challenges, you can too.

    I don't know if you've began the transition at all but don't fell out of place if you haven't or if you don't look the way you hope to. You have to remember that at some point all the transwomen at the meeting didn't look like a woman.
     
    #2 AtheistWorld, Oct 27, 2013
    Last edited: Oct 27, 2013
  3. Nick07

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    The fact that you have this one thing in common (being trans*) doesn't mean that you will "click together." Or that they will all understand you or your choices and desires. If you feel like the therapy only messes with your brain and makes you feel worse, find one-on-one therapist

    And there is nothing wrong with you *hug*
     
  4. Meribor

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    And a hug from me, too.

    You have unanswered questions, that's all. And it sounds like you are in the right place to find the answers. With time and effort you will find them.

    I may be just ahead of you in transition, having just established myself as a regular in one group and just getting started in another. I'm barely three months in, and it's weird; things are moving incredibly slow and unimaginably fast at the same time. Stay with it and be patient.

    Thing is, everyone is at their own place in their own journey. And I think it's important to note that the journey doesn't just end one day as we hope it might. Life continues. Even if someone is further along in transition, life may have recently thrown them a curve, and that may affect how they respond to you. I think it's wrong to assume they are critical of you just because you're at the beginning.

    And if they were critical of you in that way then they're jerks, plain and simple. Befriend someone else in the group. Trans* folk are still folk, just like everyone else.