Im tired of waiting on this transition, I just wanna be who I am, I hate that I can't just be a normal guy and even go through this process, It bothers me so everyone says it gets better but its not, I miss out on practically everything, How can I be happy with that I can't accomplish any of the things I want to, How can I be happy when I'm constantly missing out on life, I'm tired of waiting on the transition I'm just ready to get the he ll out of my moms house and get on T along with surgery but I feel like its taking forever, My dad can't afford for me to see a gender therapist and I absoulutely need to speak with one ASAP or I'm serioisly gonna go crazy, And do something stupid like kill myself mentally I'm drained sometimes I wish I was never born I have no idea why God would create me all I am is a fuck up who makes people unhappy because of my dumb situation that no one seems to understandI'm abnormaI Idk I'm just not getting any where my dysphoria is overwhelmin I can't even look in the mirror without breaking dow Its becoming to much to bare its never been so bad I don't even care anymore this is to much this is why n woman will want especially a straight because it'd be to weird, This is why I don't have to many friendsbecause its to weird and un natural I guess I just don't know I'm s hurt and in pain on the inside I really want to punch a wall so bad:bang:
Life's just playing hardball right now. When life plays tough, you fight back harder. Things might be dark and tough now, but being strong and fighting to the dawn is the only answer. Do your best to stay positive and try not to let bad vibes get you down. Be as strong as you can through all of this. Do your best to not to lose yourself. I'd hate to see you where I was a few months ago in a psych unit for my ideation. (bro hug)
Transgender Michigan I'm not the most empathetic guy in the world, but I can try my best to help. This site has a lot of resources; you might be able to find something.
I just don't see how I could possibly be happy, When I'm never gonna be biological male, I'm always gonna have that past of what I used to be I'm to dysphoric about everything and I'm a dumb ass when it comes to academics I suck, I'm accomplishing 0 things not to mention I'm hurting people so why not juat hurt them for a temporary time and end it eventually they will get over that rather than me transitioning
Never say never. Okay, that song was terrible. There will be a cure, there will be a way, we will find something. Giving up is not the way to go. If you think of yourself as a victim, then you will feel like a victim! Try learning something about why transgender people are the way they are. Think about it, think about how much better life will be after you start T. Seriously, try using that link I sent. It might help.
I know why trans people are the way they are, But it doesn't change the fact that not everyone agrees with it, I juat don't care anymore I'm not happy
Hell yeah, I agree with this. You're a human being, we landed spaceships on the moon, we built pyramids, we can do anything. Remember, you are a member of the most dangerous species on this planet. Sharks were like "I have teeth" and humans were like "I invented a gun." School sucks. It doesn't matter what you have between your legs. School f:***:ing sucks. Especially in the US. It's a broken, stupid system. Don't ever for one second think that just because your teacher gave you an F means you're stupid. School is stupid not you. Success in life has nothing to do with grades. Success is about doing what you want to do, accomplishing what you want to accomplish. Grades don't mean sh:***: And it kind of sounds like it's a social thing too, like you don't feel like you are the gender you are because people aren't treating you like the gender you are. Trust me, you don't start being you when people treat you like you. You start being you when you start being you. No one is going to stop you, and if they try to stop you, don't let them.
Hey - I wanted to reach out and say that if you're looking to talk to someone, you can always talk to me. (Or any other other staff members.) While none of us have been through what you're going through, many of us can relate to hopelessness and times that we didn't think we'd get through. And yet, here we all are. We all got through. And I believe you can too. We've also known unhappiness for various reasons. But just like happiness is temporary, unhappiness is also temporary. You can't really have one without the other - if that makes sense. (Here comes the speach from the 'old' person...) Remember that you're 16 years old. I don't know how long this has been an issue in your life - but presumably not since you were born - but some time more recent than that. Maybe only the last 3 or 4 years - I dont' know. And say you don't get to a point where you're really happy for another 3 or 4 years. That's 6 or 8 years, which to someone who is 16 seems like an eternity. But it's more like 7.5% to 10% of your entire life. (I'm not just old - but I'm also an accountant.) So try to keep things in perspective. You won't always live with your parents. You won't always be in high school. And you won't always be waiting to transition. These situations are temporary. And the hopelessness might come from the fact that you can't even see how these situations are going to change. But that's OK. You're not expected to know exactly how life is going to roll out and present itself. None of us do. I couldn't envision how my life could be worth living when I came out, admitted that I was an addict, and my wife left me. But a series of remarkable and amazing things happened to me in just the first year that resulted in my being happier than I had ever been in my previous 35 years. So just because you don't know how anything good is going to happen to you doesn't mean that it won't. Not sure if any of that helped, but I wanted to throw in my 2 cents and my support. I know things are rough at the moment. There's a great Winston Churchill quote: "If you're going through hell, keep going!" If you stay stuck where you are, you're going to keep feeling how you're feeling. So don't do that. Make a decision to make a change in some part of your life and act on it. You mention that your dad cant afford counselling. Have you talked to any of your teachers at school about any of this? Is there one who you like and trust who you think you could take all this up with? Or a family doctor? Or a close relative? Sometimes we need someone to talk to in real life who can offer advice and help get us on the right path. And again, if you want to reach out to me I'll do whatever I can to help.
Oh! Well if your dad has offered you help, take it! This is a difficult issue for anyone to work through on their own. You should have someone to talk to and to work with. So what's your first step?
Sites like TrueSelves and I think T-Vox have lists of gender therapists in your area if you aren't having luck finding any (there's also PFlag). There's also google. Even in my small city, where there is very little to no LGBT visibility, I found someone that works with trans clients. I'm pretty sure it shouldn't be too hard to find anyone. Here's the TS thread in question. This was started in 2005, but I'm sure people found more as the thread goes along: TrueSelves Good luck!
