Hello, all. So I went to see my therapist today, and once again, we talked about my gender identity once again, and better yet, how it affects my marriage. I had posted a thread entitled "Dysphoria and Marriage" that fully explain what I'm talking about here. I've also been thinking about what my husband said the other night, that I have to pick what I can and can't live with and change accordingly. Then I realized that there's one thing I can't live without. And that, my friends, is my husband. He most likely will not be attracted to me anymore if I make my body look more male. So what have I decided that I need to do? Nothing. I'm not transexual. I'm transgendered. I don't need to change my body. I'm a man without hormones or surgery. My journey is about learning how to be a better man. Besides, as some of you may know, some trans folks never medically transition, not because they're afraid necessarily, but because they don't need to. And I don't think I need to. My social transition is going very well, so I'm sticking with that. However, if I do decide in the future that I want to do some things on the medical end, I will, but for now, for once in my life, I'm good. :icon_bigg And reassuring my husband that I'm not changing, at least not for a long time, has noticeably made him more comfortable, which is absolutely fantastic.
I'm glad to hear that things are going well for you and that you are content with yourself and the way you are physically. I hope you and your husband have many long years of happiness together.
Hi, it's nice to see you have found what works for you Does you husband address you as a man or a woman? And your colleagues? Can you officially change your name or gender while still in the marriage? If it's too personal, forget my questions please I am just trying to learn what has helped you with the identity dysphoria.
Interesting! My situation is considerably different than yours, but similar in that fact that in many ways I feel like the other gender but I decided I won't take action by changing my body. I'll simply allow myself to change how I act around people.
Actually, almost everyone addresses me as a female. I'm not very out, but I'm perfectly happy with it, I guess. I still get treated like a guy a lot, even by people I'm not out to. I think it was something I read on Man 101 that changed my mind. It basically said that taking T and having surgery doesn't make you a man. Maturity does. My husband allows me to dress however I want, and while he still calls me his wife in public, he acknowledges me as a man. I also talked to my therapist and said that one thing that will help my husband is to reassure him that I'm not going to change. I told him in passing recently that I didn't want to take T, and he seemed pretty apathetic about it. But when I got home from therapy, I told him that he's more important to me than anything in the world, including having the body I would prefer to have. He just opened right up. It was amazing. And it's true. I am a man to anyone whose business it is. Not everyone needs to know. I'm a fairly private person. Everyone doesn't need to know, at least not yet. ---------- Post added 7th Nov 2013 at 03:43 PM ---------- That's basically how I'm doing it. I'm transitioning socially. That's all I really need to do. I might take some physical steps later, but not now. It's just not that big of a deal, I guess. ---------- Post added 7th Nov 2013 at 03:45 PM ---------- Thank you. Yeah, talking about physical transition with my husband is always scary, but things are much better now. ____________________ Also, I'm at least half-passing without hormones. That's pretty good, I think.
