So, I have the issue of having a somewhat deep voice which obviously isn't ideal for sounding feminine, and I am not sure how to combat this at all. Some people have told me to "talk more melodically", but the thing is that in my dialect/accent, both genders speak pretty much identical when it comes to tone and melody. Also I don't want to sound too flamboyant either, it's just not me and I would personally feel kinda fake and weird speaking like that (though no offense to those who do enjoy having a flamboyant speech pattern, I am not hating or judging or anything, it just doesn't fit my mouth personally is all, so don't get me wrong). So yeah I have no idea what to do. Any ideas?
Last time I asked this, someone gave me this link 008 transgender voice-1 - YouTube I've not watched it yet so I don't know if it's any good or not, but I've been sent it by 3 different people now so somebody must think its useful...
It's not so much about pitch, as it is about resonance. If you have a high pitch, but a male resonance, then you will still be gendered male. Watch the link that Ellia posted, I'm familiar with CandiFLA and she makes some GREAT voice videos. Her voice is naturally quite deep as well, and what she does with it is truly remarkable. It really is just about practice. I think the best way to improve voice is to learn the technique (watch candiFLA videos), and then use it literally all the time. I wasn't able to do that till I went full time and although I had a decent voice before full time, I really improved a lot after I was able to use it all the time when I went full time. Be careful though, if you have not built up the muscles yet, it's important to do that first (and I believe that is something that candiFLA covers).
So there is no way to just talk completely normally and still sounding female in any way? I have to practice moving my speech pattern into a whole new set of muscles and even before that embarrass myself with falsetto voices? I am not sure I can ever do this since I have no privacy ever, and I would never dare to use a falsetto voice normally. =( Also I worry about singing now. My singing voice/range is kinda low (about the same range as the chorus guest vocalist in Thrift Shop by Macklemore) and I would have liked to be able to still sing in my comfortable range just without it sounding masculine... There is also the thing about switching between voices like she did in that video, what if I accidentally slip into the "male voice" if I go with this? I often have a hard time switching between octaves for the first few words when singing songs with a lot of range in different singing styles, so what if I am singing and then my "male voice" slips out for everyone to hear? Also just to clarify, unlike the person in the video who seems to be more bi-gender and having this "male side", I want to just be completely female with no trace left of ever having been in a male body.
Hey don't stress about it. The number 1 thing to realize is that when it comes to your voice daily practice is absolutely necessary. It took me about 6-8 months to get it down, and luckily by then I was already full-time so every time I spoke was a chance for me to improve my voice. Nowadays I don't even notice it anymore. My voice is just my voice. The lessons I mostly used were from a recommendation off of tsroadmap.com. Vocal Feminization Index What it really came down to was working with my voice regularly. Usually I practiced while I was driving, since I was alone, and I could easily record myself on my phone to get instant feedback on my improvement (or lack there of lol). It's hard for me to describe how I learned to speak the way I do because I drew a lot of skill from my history as a performer. Just keep practicing and stay positive!
Yeah, it really comes down to just putting a lot of time into it. It's hard work but you can definitely do it. After you use your voice for a while, you just are able to go right into it. It will be very easy to just stay in the voice. You might slip back into your male voice at times to start, but the more you use your voice, the better it gets. I think the thing you need the most right now though is some way to get some privacy to practice. Do you drive a car? If you do, every time you drive is an opportunity to train your voice.
Well Harp, this is something I need to start doing. I've been putting it off for weeks because it scares me as well. It shouldn't, but it does. So let's get through it!
How I got my voice is... I found it! No really though... speak in falsetto, as high a pitch as you can reach, and keep talking like that for an extended period of time. Have a glass of water ready by your side, your going to need it. How long should you do this for? I don't know. I personally would read a book out loud in complete falsetto, usually one chapter at a time. Do it at a time where no one is around (so that you won't be self conscious and be able to give it your all) and eventually your natural voice is going to sound "higher." You'll get to the point where without effort your going to sound like the female you, keep practicing you'll get it. It took me about 2 months to start sounding feminin, and about 6 months after that I had the voice I always dreamed of.
I never have any privacy, especially not enough to openly speak loudly in falsetto... I don't have my drivers license yet (I don't like the idea of driving a car myself) so that is out of the picture sadly. Would singing in falsetto be as good as talking in falsetto though by any chance for practice?
You're never gonna get anything done with that "can't do" attitude. Don't worry what other people think and just close yourself in your bedroom and practice. If people make fun of you, screw them for being twats. When it's all said and done and you're living your life as a full-time woman, it won't matter what some jerk said or thought about you early on in your transition.
Hi-I'm not trans hope its ok to post on your thread... I have a deep voice for a woman. When I'm sick it goes even deeper. "totally Lauren Bacall" . Lauren Bacall was considered one of the sexiest actresses of her time with a really deep "husky" voice. Its all in the attitude. Don't think about your voice or body or clothes. Just be the woman that you are. Our EC friend June Cleaver does that. She is a role model for all women. She is confident in who she is and she lives her life that way.
Well I simply don't have the courage to do something embarrassing, especially not if I have to constantly do it for months... I am really afraid and I don't want to be laughed at. I suffer from massive PTSD due to being a victim of bullying through my whole life so having someone mock me is really triggering and hurtful. Thanks for the kind words Rose, though I do want to be more feminine than I currently am as I really don't show any of my inner femininity on the outside currently. I need to find a good way to shave my body hair regularly for example, and as I mentioned I am afraid of just being labeled as a gay stereotype instead of being considered more female. Sorry for the extremely late reply, real life decided to drop a metaphorical anvil on my head and haven't had much energy to post.
How about fixing that problem first? Having the courge to do embarrassing things is totally the biggest skill I've had to learn over the last 10 years period, trans or not, and I've been through the military and college. It's like hitting life's "easy" button. So, would you be opposed to getting one or both of your ears pierced? If you're being perceived as a boy, the left one means you're straight. I have both of mine pierced. It helps me, because in the back of mine I know people are going to see those and my pink Aididas, and some of them are going to see me as a gay man. Hey at least they're half right But I have this in my mind, and I'm taling to people who are treating me like a normal person, and it drills home something really important. It's something I know, but not deep down, unless I do this. No one cares. Really. In fact, everyone out there has something they don't have the guts to do in front of other people. And they see you, and you just make them feel more comfortable about being themselves when you're comfortable with yourself. And pretty much the exact opposite of what you're expecting is what usually happens. Yeah there are jerkwads out there. But being jerkwads, they know by now when it's a dumb idea to give people shit. Other people will hate the jerkwad, not you, if they start something. But don't go from 0 to 90, you know? Just anything slightly unusual. Your left ear pierced is fine. Something I used to do was wear obviously mismatched socks. Wear that shrt that's too small.It's more important that you do anything at all, you don't have to go overboard.
I am terribly sorry, but I am not entirely sure I understand your advice Cassie. I don't want to get any permanent body decorations that would make me look like a straight man when I am a bisexual woman on the inside, also I prefer baggy clothing not only for the comfort but because it leaves more to the imagination and it makes me feel less masculine which I find to be a good thing. Also I feel like I don't fit in anywhere and I am terrified of being mocked on the street. Sorry for not completely understanding
No I apologize for being confusing! I'm here trying to give advice; that's not going to happen if I'm not clear. I'm a lesbian woman on the inside. I'm wearing the earrings because they make me look and feel more feminine. But the fact that they could get me mistaken for a gay or bi man, when I'm otherwise "safe" in my male presentation, is why they help me get over my fear of being mocked. It also keeps me from thinking about my boy mode as "safe". And my voice is probably the hugest part of that. When my boy mode isn't where I run to to feel safe, my voice is naturally softer and more feminine. On those days when I feel like "oh this is crazy", I'll catch myself deepening my voice when I'm ordering food at McDonalds. It's like one to one, the more comfortable I am, the better my voice is. We all have that fear, and that's really where my suggestions were headed. If you do things that you're afraid will embarrass you, and they don't embarrass you, then the fear goes away. And for me that's the only real way for it to go away. Basically, you won't get mocked. People just don't do that. Other people are just as terrified as you are. They're focused on themselves. If they openly mocked you, they would be inviting negative attention toward themselves. You might get uncomfortable stares from people sometimes, but that's all people can do, is look. They can't hurt you. They can just get bent out of shape because they see something they don't like. And it is the most amazing feeling in the world, when someone is staring at you, when you look them in the eye and smile at them. It usually makes the staring stop too.
If you're sure that changing your voice is a good step for you, I have some advice on that. As a musician, a voice over artist, and someone who is also trying to sound more like the proper gender, I can offer my opinion... A voice is a cross between a skill and an instrument. You will absolutely need patience and practice to increase your vocal range or alter your default voice. It is slow and gradual going, but the results are pretty satisfying. Some exersices you can do: Read books aloud. You can use any voice you want. Try to start with your male or relaxed voice, then gradually try raising the general pitch. One note higher per page, and your voice will be very compliant. If it gets uncomfortable, lower pitch a note or two, or take a break. Water helps. You don't have to be loud. Imitate actors. When watching a show, try to mimick a funny or interesting line from an actress. If you parrot it as best you can, you'll add it to your repetoire of both melody and grammar. Believe it or not, guys and gals put thier sentences together differently. You will automatically adjust to using female speech if you acurately mimick it. Sing! Sing a song with a male vocalist at a higher octave if you can, but also try singing along with female singers. Nobody will question a guy belting out a catchy song with a female singer, and it will help you get comfortable in manipulating higher notes. Don't worry if you "can't sing"... you're not auditioning for a talent show! Just hit the notes and have fun. Some songs are easier than others, so do whatever's comfortable. Keep going, and don't worry, you don't need falsetto, and you don't need to alter your melody. Pitch is the single most prominent aspect of a passing voice, and luckily it's also the easiest, not to mention the least "fake" or "gay"! When your chords get use to your habits, the voice will become easier and easier until it is effortless. And apart from that, you can just slowly ramp up your pitch over time, or practice by talking to yourself. If you don't make a big deal of it, no one else will either. And you know, it is true that a deep female voice can be pretty awesome :3 In the end, you should just try to sound like the person you want to be. If you like your voice, it will raise your confidence no matter what it sounds like, and confidence will always help you pass. And you know? It wouldn't be a bad idea to get some help for that anxiety thing. It's no fun actualizing yourself if you're too nervous to enjoy it. Is there someone you can talk to who will help you with your fears? Someone said earlier that people are more likely to appreciate your courage than not, and I totally agree. So if it helps, know that most people would root for you, and your bullies were totally out of line. Good luck!
