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Year Book Dilemma

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by RainbowGreen, Dec 19, 2013.

  1. RainbowGreen

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    Okay, I'm officially having a shitty day/week/month or year even! Now, I asked in November if my preferred name could be used in the year book instead of the one I use now (which I hate with a burning passion of a thousand suns). They said that since it's not a legal document, it should be possible. However, they called me today and said that they couldn't do it after all. You should have seen how crushed I was (and still is). That was the only thing I was looking forward to, and they took it away from me. I'm seriously considering erasing myself from the year book altogether because I can't handle the thought of having all the secondary 5 students seeing my legal name linked with my picture. I can't change my name legally yet, since I haven't started hormones and it's required where I live. The only thing that could save me from this is if I manage to start hormones and change my name before they print. It's impossible, since it can take from 3 to 6 months to change the name alone.

    Is there something I can do about this? Or will I really have to erase myself from the school history?

    I just want to go away from this school and never come back right now...
     
  2. BookDragon

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    I may be WAY off base here, but SURELY you can change your name without hormones. Maybe not your title or legal gender, but SURELY you can change your name...what if you wanted to change your name just to something different but it had nothing to do with gender...

    Also, did you ask them WHY they can't do it? As you said, it's not a legal document, it has literally no bearing what-so-ever on them what name they put in it.
     
  3. RainbowGreen

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    Quebec is an ass for legal name change. It's the hardest province in Canada to change your name in, and it's surely harder than most states in the US. If you're not trans, you can only change your name if you used another for five years or more, your name is too hard to pronounce or if your name is ridiculous (spatula being an example). For trans people, we can only escape this by having a letter stating we started hormones.

    For why, the director said that since this is a school document, they are still bound by the official laws (didn't really get this).
     
  4. BookDragon

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    Well that's a bugger...

    Again, stepping way outside my actual field of expertise here, but surely a yearbook is NOT an official document, it's a distributed keepsake. If they need a record of who they had at the school, they HAVE school records. That's the whole point. In fact if it WAS an official school document I don't imagine they would be ALLOWED to distribute it to everyone...
     
  5. apostrophied

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    In 20 years from now, when you've got your name and your hormones figured out, what will bother you more, your old name under your picture, or not being in there at all? Did you enjoy your high school years? Do you want people to remember you? Or is this a hell that you can't wait to forget about completely?

    I think what you should do will depend on your answers to these questions.

    In term or your director's words, I am by no means whatsoever an expert on transgender issues, but if I were you, I'd try to seek a second opinion. It's quite possible he just doesn't really want to take the time to deal with it so that's why he's giving you this answer. Maybe a transgender advocacy organization could help. Try contacting the Center for Gender Advocacy at Concordia University. They might not be able to help you directly, but will surely be able to refer you or give you at least a little bit of advice.

    Good luck!
     
  6. RainbowGreen

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    The director told me that it wasn't a legal document, hence I don't understand either why I can't have my name changed in it. It'd be a real shame if I couldn't have my name in the year book because of a few months of difference.

    @apostrophied
    I can say that this school is a pain since I set foot in it. It would kill me to have my legal name under a picture I'm so proud of. I pass really well on it and I wear a tie and everything. Being absent from the book would sadden me, but not as much as having proof of me having that name dispersed all around. I sure as hell want to do everything I can to be in it, though, so I'll go and ask for help there.
     
    #6 RainbowGreen, Dec 19, 2013
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2013
  7. SWAGboy

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    I'm guessing you have had your name since birth so change it on this basis, irrespective of gender.
     
  8. RainbowGreen

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    @SWAGboy

    That'd be a lie. I only realized I was trans last year (even if I should have realized way sooner since I was never comfortable with anything female). My chosen name has only been decided one year ago. Also, I heard you only get your name in front of the other with this method :\
     
  9. Sarcastic Luck

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    You're not understanding. The school wants to use the birthname while Rainbow wants to use their chosen male name, and I'm guessing that the chosen name hasn't been used for the required five years.
     
  10. SWAGboy

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    Yeah I was telling him to get his name changed officially because he has had the same one for 5 years or more so he is allowed to then he will have a new legal name that the school will have to use.

    And to the OP it is not lying if you ask for a name change without mentioning your gender :/
     
  11. Sarcastic Luck

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    You don't know if he has or not. I'm guessing because he hasn't changed it that he hasn't used the chosen name for five or more years.
     
  12. can they just abbreviate your first name to a letter?
     
  13. RainbowGreen

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    My family actually suggested that. I'm also lucky that the letter is M, too, because it feels like it's mister (I'm French, so that's how mister is abbreviated). I'd still prefer to have my chosen name, though. If all else fails, I could probably try that.

    Also, I can't change my name legally yet, as I said previously because I only used it for one year. Like I said in my previous post, this method actually puts your new name in front of your old one, which in my case, would be pretty embarrassing :\
     
  14. BookDragon

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    Well thats...just totally weird...are your family in a position to talk to the school about this?
     
  15. Young Gun

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    I really don't know what to say about that.