I've been aware for a while now that I tend to lower my voice when I'm around straight guys. To me it sounds really fake. In general I tend to subconsciously try to act straight around my straight guy friends sometimes. Every one knows I'm gay though. Lately I've been making an effort to talk closer to my real voice. I've really been trying to limit how much my voice gets really deep. I'm still not talking in my real voice or the voice I use around my close friends who are girls. I just need to keep practicing and building my confidence.
That's cool. Just keep thinking, "I've got no reason to 'act straight' around other people, especially if they know I'm not." Personally I like guys with feminine voices.
Feminine guys are hot to me. Do you have a high pitched voice? Or is it just "code switching" you're talking about? Sometimes I feel I have to consciously lower the pitch of my voice too. It's not consistent.
My voice is a little of both. If I'm with people like a group of girls that I'm comfortable with, I have a kinda high voice. If I'm around straight guys or I just woke up, I have a pretty deep voice. Another habit I want to break is using words like "dude" and "man" the way straight guys do. I do still use those words when I'm talking in my real, more feminine voice. It's just like, guys use those words in a really deep voice and try to be cool. I feel like I do that just to fit in. Not that theres anything wrong with that, it's just not me. Idk if any of that made sense :b
I use words like that. In fact I try to keep my male mannerisms but be female externally. So that's not a problem for me but I can understand your view. Makes total sense to me.
This is a fascinating discussion! I lower my voice too when I'm around certain people, but it's because I'm trying to pass. As a transman, I'm deathly afraid of not passing, and living in the Midwest, I'm afraid of what can happen if I'm "discovered." But issues of passing aside, I've often wondered about my "real" voice. I'm not sure I have one. When I'm around female friends who know that I am a transman, my voice is pitched higher, and I do feel like I "relax" into this voice, and even though I know that it takes more effort to speak in my deeper, more masculine voice, I'm not sure that either is more real than the other. Just something that came to mind reading this discussion...
I've always presented as a burly guy but my voice sounds like a woman. Sometimes I sing in the alto range. People ma'am me over the phone. I've been thinking about shaving the facial hair and cultivating a feminine sound.
