5 years comparison

Lookin' good. I'm glad things have changed for the better for you!

 

Don't be too harsh on yourself, you didn't look awful
Do you feel like you have changed this much inside too? Mentally?

 

Thank you You know, we often hear "after the transition, you still be the same person." I know that it is hard to say. You are older, you gained a lot of new experiences. But do you feel like you can agree with the statement? Does the transition itself make a different person?
Five years ago, my views on my life were different, my dreams and expectation were different, but I feel like I can say that it is still me. "The core" hasn't changed.
How does it feel after transition?

 

Holy shit.

Or a slightly more respectable comment, but seriously DAAYUM. Fingers crossed I can say something similar when I get to that point!

 

Veeery nice, you look greaat! I agree about the "not the same person" thing. We change and we evolve. Our old selves make way for our new selves. It looks like your changes have been amazingly dramatic and super positive

Btw, did you notice that you look a good 15 years younger NOW then you did 5 years ago? Kewl beans ^_^

 

hmm, that's really interesting. I am just not sure if I see it as a positivum (in general, I am not talking about you). Because...it seems to be like a game of Russian rullete. You not only look differently, but you ARE someone else? That's a bit scary

I can understand that you change for example from depressive to happy, or from insecure to bold. Do you feel like there is more than that?

 

I'd say if you are still the same now as you were 5 years ago then I'd be surprised. Throughout your life you change based on your experiences, your reactions to them and others around you. While there is also the changes that parts of transitioning there are the natural changes of life too. And as you become more comfortable during transitioning you may easily express parts of yourself and react to the new experiences gained from how other see you as well. That treatment from others can be from passing or not passing and the fact that within society there is the levels of privilege that different groups have and the experiences gained from the change in privilege and understanding how the change in that effects what you can do.

 

You'd be surprised at how much can happen in five years. I've seen videos of extremely masculine looking men go to near "model status" in less time with HRT alone. For someone determined to live as their authentic selves, I'd be a lot more surprised if you decided to stay the same, physically and in other ways.

Wow! I might need a cold shower after seeing that. :icon_redf

 

I have been thinking about it a lot since yesterday No one in my family changed much in past five years. I reconnected with someone who I hadn't seen in 15 years. She hasn't changed much either. She got married, has kids, but she is the same person.

I understand, as I said, if you stop being insecure etc because of the transition. But I am hesitant to believe that you can become someone completely different. I don't know. I don't know any trans person in my RL.

If you was lazy, caring, slow in the morning, had short temper, if you loved kids or hated to travel, why would transition change that?

I wish I knew some trans people to ask them. If after the transition they simply got more content and satisfied, or if their family and friends feel like they become a completely different person.

 

You would be amazed, Nick, at how much transition can do to a person. There is something incredible about finally feeling comfortable in your own skin that is difficult to put into words, but it removes so many barriers. It won't change everything but it makes a lot of things so much easier.

Laziness, for example, pre-transition can come from the fact that you have no motivation. What's the point in exercising if I'm just going to have a fit male body! After transition, it's a different story! Same goes for other aspects of laziness. Why do all the cleaning, I'm miserable and it's not going to make me feel any happier. It's not like a miracle cure, but at least after transitioning you find yourself in a position where these things have some value!

Slow in the mornings? 4 months ago I'd wake up in the morning and think 'I could kill myself with that...', that'll make you slow in the mornings. I admit I'm no better in the mornings in terms of waking up, but I never wake up and think 'today is a good day to die', which is always pleasant.

Short temper? Again, if you're sitting there hating your situation, you're going to have a short temper. Being yourself has a wonderful calming effect - suddenly the rest of the world doesn't seem QUITE as bad as it was.

It does all sorts of things. It can make you sociable where you were previously introverted. Cheerful where you were sad. It adds colour where there was none. There are so many positive aspects to it that come to those of us who really needed to transition that it's difficult NOT to change at least in some respects!

 

Thank you, Holly, I think it makes sense
You mentioned positive aspects... Are there some negatives too?

 

I'm scared some of my family are distancing themselves from me, even though they insist that they aren't.

I could probably add that there is the obvious concern that eventually someone will do or say something negative about it in the street or something, but actually when I'm out I don't care. I can walk down the street now and when someone gives me a weird look it washes over me. You just sort of feel like 'You're staring but I KNOW I look good, bitch!'

There is a lot of anxiety and worry that comes with transition because it's new and it's scary and there is SO much I don't know. I have 2 female friends and I don't see them often...well three if you count my friend from therapy. I don't know how to make more, so yeah that scares me. Having said that, I've never felt more capable of DEALING with these negative things in my life. So I guess it balances out?

 

People like you give me hope that, maybe one day I'll have the cojones to do what you did.
I think I'm too manly to transition and look passable.

 

See you say that Drago, but your eyes and mouth suggest you'd look good! Just y'know...lose the chest hair ;D

 

You're far too kind, my hands are super manly and so are my feet. My ex used to tell me that I had potato feet and toes
I hate body hair anyway. I'll probably get laser hair removal of my arms this year. Then work southward

 

You're right, I am kind, but I'm also telling the truth! At least you're not the only one dealing with manly hands and feet! You ever try finding size 12UK womens shoes? The upper-most size seems to be 9!

 

I'm not familiar with UK shoe sizes, but in the US I'm size 11 man shoe, which is pretty large, I think.
And my hands are not large, but they are thick and rough. Not feminine at all.
Mind you, I have no idea how powerful HRT can be, I've seen many pictures and videos online, but they never seem to focus on either hand or feet.