So this is probably one of the stranger posts I have found myself needing to write. I've been socially transitioning for a while now and I'm getting to the point where I can just about get away with being an unattractive girl in public. That is, until I speak. The second I open my mouth all doubt it lifted and suddenly the world thinks "HOLY FUCK that ugly girl is a bloke!" Which, if I'm honest, really sucks. So voice training seems to be the way forward. I have been putting it off for ages and I promised myself and my bestest friend (who is really looking out for me) that after my choir concert I would start trying (didn't want to screw with my voice before performing!). With the concert out of the way and with a slight road-bump from being in hospital since then, I've now come to the realisation that I need to start work. And I am fucking terrified. I cannot get my head round it at all. I don't THINK this is something that should scare me! I accept that part of me stubbornly wants to just blunder on using my normal voice and force the world to accept it, which on the one hand I really sort of agree with. I don't, after all, want to just put on a false voice forever...I want it to be MY voice...I don't want it to feel like I'm just acting. I can't wear wigs, because it feels like I'm pretending to be somebody else, if I'm putting on another voice...I don't know... Really, I am getting ahead of myself with my concerns, because I don't know anything at all about how the whole thing works. I don't know if you can make your voice gradually higher and stay there or if I'll have to just pretend forever...which is my own fault but again, for some reason every time I've gone to look it up I've chickened out. Has anyone actually tried this and can tell me something about it...I will start tomorrow I swear it.
Just like a ventriloquist, it takes practice to change your voice. It's hard to speak with a different inflection, accent or pitch. Doesn't matter. I think your voice training is a good idea besides hormones for you. But here's one thing you can, and I think NEED to try is to actually try and speak to someone in natural dialogue with someone in the voice you want. I tried to work with my feminine voice in person... But I just can't come up with a real conversation. You need to adapt on the fly. Like language, study means nothing if you can't apply it.
A a cis-male, I have to start by saying I can't possibly relate to what you're going through right now, but you've helped so many others on this site through transitioning and beyond, that I feel that I owe it to you . To me, going through with voice training wouldn't be "putting on another voice" - it would be simply fine-tuning the one that you already have. It's just like learning anything else - you didn't learn to sing without voice training, so why should this be any different? I wouldn't view this as an "act" but instead as learning "the new you". If you don't want to go on with voice training, and continue "blundering" around in your "normal" voice, that's completely acceptable as well. If other people think that you're a dude, that's on them, not on you. Some women have deep voices - I once knew a cis-woman that if you spoke to her on the phone, you'd swear she was a man. So either way, don't let your voice get you down. Either embrace the "new you" or realize that just the way you are is fine too.
@Kasey I'm hopefully going to be able to talk to my best friend over skype or something...I'm not sure I dare talk to anybody else just yet. Mum would laugh if I tried with her. @Rainbow I will try and think of it like that and see if it works! Thanks @Techno It certainly might! I'll watch it tomorrow and see Thanks guys <3
Well with your friend, but using actual real conversation I bet will help... At least give you confidence. Keep your head up, these speed bumps slow you down, but you keep going. I've only been around briefly but I've seen you go through ups and downs. You'll make it work.
I know what you mean! But I think it's more like fine tuning. :3 Also, that different way sounds harder to me! (Not trying to put you off or anything. ) But yeah, keep at it and you'll be fine. :3
Is it possible for you to see a speech-language therapist? They would be able to help you and give advice how to train your voice without causing harm... If you try to change it too much too suddenly, you might end up hurting your larynx. If you can't meet a therapist, at least be careful and don't push it. If you start feeling pain or any uncomfortable feelings, you should take rest.
Idk if anyone has already said this, but one trick that seems to work (or at least is a good starting point maybe, I've only practiced this a bit on my own) is: You know how you can make two basic voices? High pitched mickey mouse, and then low pitched darth vader? I'm guessing you normally talk in a darth vader voice but in a normal guy tonal range. Try going into mickey mouse mode, and then lowering your voice as much as you can before you have to switch to darth vader mode in order to go lower. So basically, start in a high pitched voice, and then lower your voice until your voice cracks. That point right before your voice cracks is where you want to be. But like I said, I have only practiced this a little. Maybe that's not the way to do it, but it's pretty easy to do and probably sounds better than a full on man voice. ---------- Post added 4th Jan 2014 at 10:50 PM ---------- Oh! And don't call yourself ugly, I'm sure you're beautiful
You should never feel pressured to do anything that you don't feel comfortable with, but I feel a desire to alter your voice is far from being "fake." On the contrary, it's a brave step to outwardly express who you truly are inside. And, for the record, I just perused the few photos you have on your profile, and you are NOT ugly! PLEASE get that nasty lie out of your head!
I can finally be helpful to you in someway Holly! Its about time I can actually speak on a topic I have some knowledge in. You have been nothing but awesome so I want to help you with your voice. First, have a tape or digital recorder handy. Second, find a voice that you might be able to mimic. Third, practice as much as 15 minutes a day. Here's one thing i've learned from experience. You dont necessarily need to speak with a falsetto. What I can recommend is taking a female scarf and wrap it around your neck enough to add a little bit of pressure on your Adams apple. Dont choke yourself but tie the scarf enough where you can do this without hurting yourself. Speak in a lower volume, I find myself sounding more feminine when the volume is lower and speak with fewer words. Most important! Record yourself so you can check your results. And girl, you are not ugly. I have seen ugly and you're not even close. XOXO Monika
