Without ambition?

I know the feeling somewhat, I tend to be the person who changes interests a the flick of a switch, and so does my life ambition haha.

But I get having no drive, i felt that way all of last year because my dysphoria was extreme at the time, and as a result it was all I ever thought about. But you know what? I decided I wouldn't let my cirumstances bring me down, and i'm now an honours student at University, studying something i've always loved.

My advice? Find something you love and do the research into it! Having an ambition and loving what everything it entails tend to go hand in hand .

 

A couple of things to think about for you here.

1. You are 15! There are usually 3 types of people in terms of long-term career goals at age 15.
-People who were passionate about something from an early age and kept with it and will never leave it
-People who like something more than something else, decide it's their 'lifelong dream' and have about a 35% chance of it actually happening, but are more likely to realise it sucks once they get to uni (believe me I've been there)
-People who honestly know they don't have a career plan

Any of those is fine, and personally at your age, I'd prefer to be in your position (option 3) than in option 2 any day!

2. You haven't learned a damn thing.

This isn;t an attack on you, it's just the way education works. We teach the fundamentals and a bit of extra stuff that either has a little bit of practical value or used to be important 100 years ago and nobody thought to ask why.

SO you learn to read and write and do maths. Perhaps you learn a bit of history. They broaden it out at secondary because you DID the basics and now you're expanding. Perhaps you start a language or something. The older you get, the closer you get to the illusion of choice - you pick subjects, perhaps a couple you never studied before.

None of that prepares you for anything useful. I wanted to do something history related when I was older. I loved history from a young age and always wanted to learn a bit more and go to museums and things. I excelled at history up until your age, and then I chose to take it further. So that was what...7 years ago now and I can assure you my job has NOTHING to do with history, and short of maybe 4 or 5 jobs, it never will.

WHY? Because when I took history at 16+ everything changed. At that point you have CHOSEN to do it, you're not being forced, so they don't have to pretend that all of it is fun or even worthwhile. At least that's how I saw it at the time. I got bored SO fast. Luckily I remembered my love of music which I ALSO loved from a young age. So I started a diploma in audio engineering.

Now at this point my goal was to be an audio engineer an a theatre in London. It seemed like the best plan I'd ever had. Until I started school and realise how god damned boring that job can be. Probably the most important thing to understand from this is that even if you reach your goal it isn't going to be how you thought it was, because most of the time there is someone, or even a whole LOAD of people above you telling you exactly what to do and why you're doing it wrong - in a non-constructive way you understand.

What I'm saying is, goals are great BUT not having specific long-term goals isn't BAD. There's no point in just trying to pick one out and forcing yourself through it because it takes a hell of a lot to get there and you want to be able to say that you are pleased you did so.

If I had to choose now between setting myself a goal of being...I dunno...a marine biologist or a retail worker who spends her weekends playing mandolin and singing in her choir and reading and learning Japanese, I'd take the last one any day.

I like marine biology, but I couldn't force myself through all of the things I DON'T like about it, just to say I have a professional career. For every hour I spent diving with sharks I'd spend 23 doing some other crap I don't enjoy...tedious paperwork for example. Retail might not be a professional career, hell I would HATE to do it, but I'd rather spend some time doing a job I don't like and fill the rest of it with things I love.

If you want goals, look around, do things that interest you and look deeper than the surface. Look outside school, look at what you enjoy doing as a hobby, look deeper into your hobbies and see if people make money off it. Make your goals something you actually WANT to achieve and are prepared to work for.

If you set yourself a load of goals and then fail them, you are going to feel pathetic. Who fails every goal they set!? Your parents want good things for you, like a 'professional' career, but you won't get there if you don't want to and forcing yourself just makes things worse.

 

There's a hell of a lot more to life than academic stuff you know...

You can't be a doctor and be afraid of blood, that HAS to be a rule...I mean it just HAS to be...

If you don't have anything you love that's fine, you don't have to. I was asking myself this exact same question a few months ago 'what should I do with my life'. So now I'm trying things. I'm playing musical instruments again, I'm doing some voluntary work (which I realise probably isn't a practical thing at your age, but something to consider later on), I'm reading, I'm studying different things online.

Think of something you enjoy doing. You don't have to be that good at it, just something you enjoy. Do it then read a bit about it online, something a bit more in depth. So for me, I enjoy music, so I'm looking at how to improve techniques. It'll never be a career for me, but it doesn't matter because I'm learning how to look deeper than the surface at things and pick out what makes an activity worth while. It's meant that when I look at the work I do with children, I know I enjoy it but I can say that actually, I really enjoy helping children who are struggling academically so now I can look at home to improve that...

You are far better off setting a goal to improve on something you enjoy and seeing where it takes you!