Hey it's good to get your feelings out, and writing can be good for that. No one here or anywhere else can tell you whether you are gay or bisexual. I know it all seems really scary right now but you will work your way through it. When you have been with someone as long as you have with your boyfriend any decisions have to be taken carefully. There are some things to think about. Forgetting about this girl for a moment. Say this girl was out of the picture, would you still want to be with your boyfriend. Do you think the fantasy of the girl is better than perhaps the reality would be? Forgetting everyone else around you, assuming you won't upset anyone what would you choose to do? From what you have said I get the feeling you think you are gay and that you would most like to just be with the girl but it feels like you are scared of hurting your boyfriend and your family etc. I could be wrong but that is the feeling I get from your post.
