Help indentifying myself

Hello.

I am new in these parts, and am a bit curious about figuring out myself, or at least getting advice or just someone to give a name to what I've been going through.

I am a 21 year old man, and for the past few months, have been struggling to come to term with some personality traits, attractions and other things I've had haunting me.

Firstly, I have never been quite masculine or feminine. I don't know how to explain it, but I have several "expected gender rules" going through me at once. As a man, yes, to an extent, I like action, testing myself with things and other such things; however, I feel as if I am very much in touch with my feminine side as well. Not to sound creepy, but there is something very relaxing and rewarding for me to nurture kids and on a different note, I openly enjoy things that a man might get questioned for in some places, such as "cute" things, not not taking serious risks due to worry (or just common sense, perhaps). As a kid, and still to this day, I am emotionally sensitive to things, and the people around me. If someone is going through a tough time or showing emotions, I feel crushed, and am tempted to let loose and give them a "feminine" response, such as sincere compassion via wanting to weep with them or hugging them. I find it almost therapeutic to let loose my feelings sometimes. I have various desires, fantasies and attractions, but two that stand out are an attraction to someone who is more powerful than I, and may "wear the pants" in the relationship. I enjoy providing, taking charge and asserting my independence, but I feel a sense of security and comfort with someone else, male or female, who appears "tough" physically or mentally. (physical strength, a serious attitude, a wild side) Of course, I have nothing against their opposites, either. I highly like the "motherly" or caring type, too. But I also have fantasies about being a sensitive, passionate, romantically involved person in the bedroom, possibly taking a female role pampering my partner. I am attracted to females, but I have found myself *slightly* attracted to a handful of men I've met. Though I slightly question my orientation.

I am not sure if this is simply my personality, or if I cannot identify myself with a gender or role, or if I am bisexual with desires and attractions, or what, but I would seriously enjoy some support, reassurance and perhaps some idea of what this might mean. I'm pretty sure this thread belongs here, but if it doesn't feel free to move it. It seemed best fitting at a glance. If you require more details, please let me know.

Thanks, and all the best.

 

Thank you. :3

That is true.

I would feel good, and I would find it fitting and possibly complementary, as I know those are good traits for a person to have.