I don`t know. I just read some stuff and suddenly i start questioning my gender, and it freaks me out. Am i the only one to have this reaction to something like that? I just, lately i have started questioning my gender. I`ve cut my hair short, i`ve started dressing more tomboyish if you could say that. I also was asked by my grandma if i have bought a dress or if i have a dress to wear at my mothers wedding this summer. I just felt conflicted and it felt wrong. I don`t know why, but i just felt really uncomfortable with that. Lately i have been trying on dresses and skirts i have in my closet, but i just hate wearing them. I don`t really understand i used to like it before, but now i just hate the way i look with them on, seeing my body figure like that and just, ugh no! I also feel more like i want to be with the boys, but it changes. sometimes i am girlish, but most of the times i feel like i want to be one of the boys. I constantly look at the boys, and i actually find myself feeling jealous of them. I see their hair, wishing i could have that, i see how they dress, wishing i could dress like that, i see how they act, wishing i could talk to them like that and act like that as well. I want to be seen as one of the boys, and that happens a lot. I`Ve been depressed a lot lately, and when i start thinking and questioning my gender i feel scared and conflicted. It`s just scary, i feel it when i`m at clothing stores and i see the guys section and i just feel dragged towards it. It is like i then mentally slap myself and tell myself to snap out of it and try go find some t-shirts or braas or something. I also notice how i choose clothes that cover up my boobs, how i think about how it would be not to have them there. I`ve even been thinking about what it would be like haveing guy parts and being a guy, and as soon as i bring that up i shut it down and get scared. I am being really honest here, and i am nearly hyperventilating as i am writing this. Just, do you think this could be a sign or something? I`m just scared of myself thinking like this, but at the same time it feels like this is what i want and i am draggen in two directions.
Al right. Take a second to breathe. I went through this same thing. The glorious part about life is that you can experiment.Stand in front of a mirror. Say the phrase, "I am female." Does it feel right?." Say the phrase "I am male" What about now? There are a few questions you need to ask yourself. If you could wake up as the oppossite gender, would you? can you see yourself ten years from now as a woman/man? would you be happy? Don't be afraid. There are so many genders, and you don't have to be one or the other. You have plenty of time to figure this out. Do what makes you feel right inside. If you feel male. Then just go with it. If you're feeling female, then be female. It you feel neither, then don't fear, just do what makes you feel right. As long as you're not hurting anyone and you're in a safe environment. You rock you.
You don't have to figure out your gender right now. You are very young and you have lots of time to figure it out. Some people struggle with figuring out their gender for their entire lives, others it will take a shorter amount of time.
I've never liked dresses. I've never worn skirts or stuff. I hate them. I'm a bit of a tomboy if I had to label myself. I questioned my gender, too. And I admitt I was really afraid to be trans. Yea, I was. But now I'm not afraid anymore. I am what I am. I'm a girl. I don't wanna be a boy. That's me. Take yourself time to figure it out. Calm down. Don't be afraid. You are what and who you are. Not important what or who. Just be yourself. That's all that counts! You could be trans but also not. Some questions do need a amount of time. If you wanna wear boys clothes then wear them. If you might wanna be a boy then be one. Just be who you are. Hope that helped a bit Write me if you feel like talking bout this!!!!
Thank you so much, i really needed that. I am confused, but at the same time it is scaring me too much. I think i would be something in between maybe, i just don`t know. I think i would feel a lot better having other pronouns, but i just don`t know. What would my parents say, what would my friends say? it`s just scaring me so much i can`t even think properly about it. ---------- Post added 2nd May 2014 at 07:44 PM ---------- I feel better now, i got some time to just calm down. I think i need to be more open minded when it comes to myself, and just do what feels right. I don`t need to label myself or overthink, i just need to let myself be me, and i need other people in my life to respect that as well. Thank you guys so much for the advices you wrote down here, it really helped me calm down again.
If you need to talk I'm here. Everyone is here for you. Do something you enjoy for a while. Don't think about your friends and family yet. If you're in the middle, then that's all right. You shouldn't worry about family until you know what you are. You may change your mind. Try it out for a while. It never hurts to try. If you ever need to talk, just send me a message.
Took me 32 years to finally figure myself out. You're half my age. Don't rush it if you aren't comfortable.
Hey man. I really feel you right now. You are basically describing the last six months of my life. Now....Breathe. Again. Slowly. And again. And once more. You feeling a bit better? Good. 1. Get yourself a therapist. You don't have to tell your family why you need to see someone, just be vague or make up a reason. Because of confidentiality, the therapist won't be able to tell your parents anything that you tell him/her, so you'll have a safe space to work through both the gender problems and the depression/anxiety. 2. Slow down. This isn't timed. You should stop worrying about figuring out the nuances of your gender. Get your anxiety under control, work out some ways to make yourself feel better day to day, then you can focus on labeling yourself. 3. Find a support group. I don't know where you live exactly, or how liberal it is, but there may be queer organizations in your area where you can meet and talk to other people with similar problems. If there isn't, find someone at your school who you trust and come out to them about your confusion. Then you will have someone to lean on who can support you. We're all here for you. Good luck.
