I'm severe with myself.

May I suggest a nice white dress shirt and some good vests that fit nicely? A pair of black pants would be good too. It is more of a mature style. Many 12th years wear things like that in my school. It looks quite nice. I'm not so sure about summer styles though. Don't be so harshwith yourself, as people, we are always growing and changing. That means our styles do too. Be careful not to be too nitpicky! Try to avoid shaggy hair, clean cuts are what you're looking for. I'm not too great with clothing, so I hope this helped a little. Good luck finding your style. C:

 

Oh, I'm sorry I misunderstood. But I think it boils down to just trying to accept yourself. Think about the things you like rather than the ones you dislike. I know it's harder than it sounds, but you can do it. c:

 

Wanting to be perfect isn't a simple desire, my friend. It is one that sits deep inside of us and possesses us like specters. That's why it's so hard to escape; it's as if you're being haunted by yourself. Every minor thing seems a huge defect that seems so apparent that it becomes a point of obsession. I don't know the cure. I think that the problem stems from a desire for self-actualization - we want to become our mental archetypes but maybe it isn't possible?

Perhaps make a wager of control with yourself? For every flaw that you see, force yourself to look for something good - this will cause you to struggle and eventually, you may stop looking for flaws because looking for their good counterparts costs too much effort?

I dunno how to fix it... Sorry, bro. (*hug*)

 

I think that the more confident you become about who you are (and I'm not talking only about gender) the less you'll need to care about how you appear. Your appearance will almost "automatically" reflect your personality without trying hard, and small details won't matter.

 

I was born average not a hottie but not an ugly duckling either. What about me that is unique is my thought and/or my personality. if you are severe to yourself its because you need to find a hobby or a job anything to balance your time in your life. dating might help you take the focus off your obsession with yourself.

 

That is a distraction, not a solution...

 

Time to combine quotey thingies:

"Perfection is an illusion that manifests in the eye of the beholder."

Basically put, people try to "perfect" themselves/others/things/etc as a sort of compensation for something that is missing, but are never satisfied because changing something cannot help reach something that doesn't exist. The only way to reach "perfection" is not by trying to change something, but by changing how you look at it.

For example, as a mental excercise, picture in your mind, a "perfect world". Now, find a flaw. It's no longer perfect is it? Now fix the flaw. Perfect right? Now find a new flaw. Do this enough and you'll come to realize you can always find a flaw even in the "perfect" world you envisioned. Now stop and consider why you thought that world was perfect in the first place. You see, perfection is what happens when you see things on a deep level; when you can understand and accept it. Try doing this with yourself. Understand that there are opportunity costs to everything and that you are doing the best you can with what you know/have.

Ultimately, you just have to let go and allow yourself to simply... be.

Hope this helps (*hug*)