So for the last few years I've worked summers at this engineering place as a temp. My dad got me the job, and it's kind of a weird circumstance, but basically I'm not an employee, but more like a contractor that my dad is hiring out and stuff. Basically my dad is in charge of my employment at this particular job. Anyway, I just moved back to the parents' house for the summer this weekend and my dad told me today that the company is ready for me to come in tomorrow and to make sure I'm ready with my work clothes and a haircut, and that was basically it. He's made me get a haircut for the job before a few years ago, my hair was really long, even longer than now, and he made me get it cut to maybe an inch and a half long, it looked soooooo bad and I put up a big fight about it. The thing was that he said he refused to let me work there if I didn't get the haircut and that I could keep my hair if I wanted, but I'd have to find employment at McDonalds or something. I really don't want to have to cut my hair again, but this job is really great and I don't really have any other prospects for right now. Plus, my dad KNOWS I'm trans, or at least am identifying as such, since my mom told him after I told her, but he still wants me to get my hair cut and look like a fucking gross ass man. It's super frustrating...
That's a horrible situation, sorry you have to go through it. But I'd say look for a different job. If your Dad is making such a big deal about this and offering an ultimatum, screw it. Do what makes you happy!
Have you tried talking to him about attaching your hair? Maybe you can keep them long and still look professionnal. If all else fails and you really have to go for the haircut, maybe you could go for the pixie cut, that way you will still have that feminine haircut.
You're young. Find a different job. ---------- Post added 5th May 2014 at 07:13 PM ---------- That is completely insensitive and also not allowable under regular HR circumstances. Don't cut it!
Well, I chatted with my parents tonight and the hair thing wasn't brought up, even though we talked about when I was going to be going into work tomorrow and stuff. I don't know if my mom told him to let it go or if he forgot or what but I'm just gonna go in tomorrow like it was never mentioned in the first place and see what happens.
Hi there! Sorry to read that you are having bit of difficulty with your dad, but it is possible that he has given it another thought, as he knows that you are identifying as transgender. Yes, go to work tomorrow, and just see what he says. If he does come back and says something, maybe try having a chat with him about how you when he is asking you to get a fair cut. A part of me thinks that your dad just might need a bit of time to come fully around to your coming out. Hope it goes well for you tomorrow. (*hug*)