Are/can you be sexual in your "wrong" body?

It is possible to be sexual in the wrong body but not everyone does

 

I'm a gay guy. I've always like men, always been attracted to them. Had a crush on the green/white power ranger growing up lol. I'm not sure what you mean by "how is it related to your body".

So, I'll just go with how I feel with things.

Bluntly put, I've never had sex. I've done the whole making out thing, but it hasn't gone beyond that. I'm highly uncomfortable on being the receptive one, and the thought of penetrative sex? Uh. No. Nope. Abort. I've always felt like this, too, even before I settled on my true gender.

On the flip side, I like being on top. It feels right.

 

My answer won't be the best but it's my experience so, take it for what it's worth.

I'm straight (Kinsey 0, if it matters ). I have always known that I was attracted to women (since age 4 at least). I thought that at some point, I would "learn" to like guys, too but it never happened. I have never been attracted to a man or even to a masculine woman in my life. It's not a big deal really so, I never struggled much with my sexuality.

Regarding intimacy, I've never even kissed someone before but I know myself well enough to answer. If I were engaged or married, I would really strongly prefer to have had top surgery beforehand but if my wife/ fiancee were OK with it, I think that I would be as well. I dunno... making love, in my mind, should really be something special and emotional; it should be like you're kinda willing your love into a physical act. Maybe I'll never experience this but I think that if I do and I've made it to that point, I would really hope that I would be OK with my body. At that point, wouldn't it be hating something that belongs to the person you love because you kinda belong to each other? This is what I feel about it. :3

 

I'm gay, but for a while before I knew I was a guy I called myself asexual because I repressed all sexual feelings because I didn't feel comfortable enough doing anything sexual with this body. I don't think I would want to be sexual at all at least until I get hormones, preferably top surgery too. I have a really low sex drive anyways so it doesn't matter much.

 

I called myself asexual there for awhile, too. However, I don't know how much of that was actually me and how much was medication suppressing things.

 

Yeah- I've never had sex myself. So I can't say I know how sexual I could be in the wrong body, you know? I don't know if I'd be comfortable being penetrated but like the idea of being on top.

 

It's complicated for me. I experienced sexual abuse when I was 11 which effed everything up for me in that area of life - and the main reason I kept denying I was trans for three years. I'm not a virgin, but I've never enjoyed the 'straight' way or whatever term you want to use.

I think I understand what you mean about not feeling like you could be sexual in any way. I can't imagine doing anything with this body with anyone. I'd be too self-conscious and worrying constantly about how they're reacting. I wouldn't be able to be comfortable enough to enjoy whatever.

I've had lots of back and forth with my sexuality and trying to work out if I was gay or bi. Given up on figuring it out and letting what happens happen. But pretty sure until hormones and top surgery, I'm not getting into a relationship. xD

 

I am very nearly the opposite of this. Gay woman, definitely not on top - although next to is about right, I don't mind being taken care of one bit but definitely not every time. Some similarities; the fact that penetration is kind of terrible is one of the reasons the "straight" relationship I tried to have did not work.

I guess if you are looking for advice, just keep an open mind. It really is different when you can be yourself. Don't be afraid, if you thought one thing about yourself and you discover something different, to just tell people something different from what you told them before. You were right then and right now; you just know more about yourself now, and are in a different situation now, is all.

 

Ive felt broken when it came to sexuality for a long time. I conformed to a normal male role in straigjt relationships and spent the last 10 or so years hiding in them being miserable. I thought I must be gay because sex with women didn't feel right. Then I realized that sex didn't feel right because I don't like the part I was given and it led me to feel awkward and avoid sex altogether. I would rather perform oral or get handsy or just always not be in the mood.

I've been married 3 years and in this relationship for 5 in total. My wife is an amazing woman and we are coming to terms with my gender issues and hopefully as they get resolved or we make other arrangements we can sort it out. But as it stands now, no, sex is terrifying to me.

In my teens til mid 20s I was in a relationship off and on with the same person for years and had sex 1000s of times and I either was drunk, high or masking my emotions and just focused on making my partner happy. Many times I was just miserable.

Since I've been slowing coming to terms with my internal feelings and my external being sex has been a struggle and honestly it has caused many issues in my relationship. I don't think we've had penetrative sex as a couple in 2 or 3 months. And before that it was like once a month which for many people is non existent and causes a drifting apart.

 

The short answer: No. I tried and failed.

I've been with 7 men total (several of them was just once - not one night stands, but it didn't last after we'd had sex). I've always been attracted to men, very. I wanted intimacy and wild passionate sexy fun times. I'm fine with everything except penetration. When it came to that, no matter what I did, how hard I tried, it never felt right. It felt like I was being violated and experimented on and all kinds of wrong.

It killed me, because I really wanted a physical relationship with a man. I still do.

For a bit I thought maybe I was a lesbian because I hated having sex with men so much (lol, 'cause that's how it works, right?) but I quickly squashed that idea. Then I thought I was asexual but that didn't feel right either. Finally, I just said I wasn't penetration positive. After that I rejected attention because I knew if I pursued another guy, eventually, he'd want to go there. And there was no way I would subject myself to that again.

I've also thought about how I would be if I just used a strap-on. You know, if I could be with a guy as a chick with one. Would that be okay? The answer is no. I don't want to be a chick with a strap-on. I'd rather be a dude with a strap-on. And in my mind they are two completely different things. So. That was actually one of the major things that led me to figuring out I'm trans.

This is something I've dealt with for a very long time and thought a heck of a lot about. Big part of my journey.

 

Yes, I am able to be. I prefer receptive penetrative sex, but I mean, I definitely reciprocate stuff.

 

As far as my identity goes, I'm pan identified (I find it easier to say queer since it fluctuates), and I've played for many teams before. However, I'm mainly drawn to men these days and I doubt I'm looking back at this point.

I am sexually active, but I don't do too much since I'm very self conscious with my body and I doubt I'd be able to do a whole lot with my partner until I'm completely post-op (which might not happen). I don't know how I feel about penetration either, probably would cause me too much dysphoria if we tried something. I don't know, things can change...but probably not for a long time with me.

 

Well, let's see...I'm gay, I think. I don't know when I came to this conclusion - I don't really experience sexual attraction per se, but I have had sex, and would again (yes, even though my body doesn't feel physically right), and I prefer male partners. That being said, that preference for male partners has been pretty clear in the past and generally remains so.

In all honesty, I don't like physical contact in general, so it's not easy for me to engage someone like that beyond my own satisfaction (I am a terrible boyfriend). I don't seek out intimacy because it's just not a high priority for me. But that has less to do with my gender and my body issues, and more to do with me just not being all that great at intimacy. Before I could pinpoint why I was uncomfortable with my body, when I still identified as "probably female", this was still an issue for me.

 

I'm still a virgin, so I don't know >//<

I always liked girls, never been attracted to men. I'm not sure how it'd go if I tried to be sexual with a girl, like I dunno if I'd be able to do typical penetrative sex like a man would.

 

for me, everything i've done sexually has been for someone else, not for me. so, i don't really know. it's hard for me to imagine anything in that realm because in terms of my body, i'm a bit... lost.

 

I've contemplated a few times whether or not my asexuality is/was a manifestation of dysphoria, seeing as I've never had much interest in sex or sexual activity. Would it be different if I had male parts? Perhaps. I know I've always had interests in people, either romantically and/or aesthetically, but the sexual part has always been vague. I wonder if this would still be the case had I not experienced bodily dysphoria.

Physical intimacy was an issue early on in my relationship; I didn't enjoy being touched in certain places, certain acts were nauseating to me, etc. After being on hormones for a while, I started to become more comfortable about sex, I was open to trying new things and seeing what worked out. Having an understanding partner, someone I could communicate with about everything pertaining to the act itself helped tremendously. I'm also sure once I'm post-op (top surgery), I'll feel much less dysphoric in those specific contexts.

 

I'm not trans* but I'm non-binary who "sees sex through male eyes". I don't mind penetration much as long as I'm the top and it's me who's in complete control but I don't fancy my bf to touch me down there at all. I don't know how much of it is caused by my gender identity and how much by my sexuality though.

 

I used to be sexually active, but I always felt guilty about penetration. Like it was something I should not be doing. I would always opt for oral, giving not receiving, I tried to avoid anything involving my "thing"