I'm another one of those that is not sure of their sexual orientation or gender identity yet. But I'd like to sort it out soon so I won't keep wondering. I'm biologically a girl, and I haven't left that side, but I have a masculine side as well. When I was little I "trained my voice" to get low so that even in my regular speaking voice, it would be lower than all of the other girls at school. At the time I didn't really think about why I should do it, more like I felt more comfortable with that voice. Nowadays I dress like a guy to school 95% of the time, but usually just boys' sportwear so far. I sit like a boy and have pondered before if my walking is boyish. There are other small things, too. I have 2 questions to ask this community in this forum: 1. Is being a tomboy just a "phase" or does it really mean I am bi-gender/androgynous? 2. If you answered the former to the above question, disregard this... But If you answered the latter... How are some ways to distinguish bi-gender-ness from androgyny? I know that bi-gender kind of means the masculine and feminine side come out at different, separate times, and androgyny means they mix together at the same time... but what if it's hard to tell because both happen? (Some days, I find myself completely feeling and acting like a girl; some days completely like a boy; and some days a mixture of both.) Thanks if you read all ofthat, I'm done rambling now. X3
I'm a tomboy...always have, always will. I don't think being a tomboy can be a phase. It's who you are. Just like being gay, straight, bi, or pan can not be a phase.
I'm just like you, I never realised that I would make my voice a bit deeper than that of the other girls, but it's now my regular tone. Plus I never liked high-pitched voices. I also remember intentionally training myself to walk without wiggling my hips, even though people actually told me to wiggle them. So no, being a tomboy, or masculine, is not a phase, it's just a way of expressing who you are. In regard to your second question: bi-gender - as far as I know, being bi-gender means that you feel that you are both masculine and feminine, either at the same time or at different points of time. androgyny - is that you LOOK or APPEAR to be the opposite gender/in between the two binary genders (male and female). It's not about how you feel, but how you look. If you do actually feel like you may not be a girl, you should definitely look into other possibilities. There are over 50 different types of genders. Such as: Agender (feel as though you have no gender), non-binary (neither male nor female), genderqueer (if male and female were on opposite ends of a spectrum, a genderqueer person would go up and down this spectrum, so changing their gender expression regularly) Hope this helps
Tai, welcome to EC! Well, actually, being a tomboy could be just a phase, but it may not be. For instance, I was a tomboy when I was a kid, and it turned out just to be a phase. I recently realized that I'm transgender, a trans man and not a masculine woman. I guess "phase" is the wrong word. It was more like foreshadowing. The thing is that is just all depends. It sounds to me like you could be genderfluid. I'd say, as far as distinguishing between androgynous and bigender in terms of expression, it's tricky. Sometimes I think I'm doing everything right and then get misgendered. I'd say you should just experiment and see what you're comfortable with.
Thank you all for your responses. So what is genderfluid, then? And from theworldunseen's view, I guess i am bi-gender...
This is the definition on Urban Dictionary, I feel it encompasses the meaning of being gender fluid : Gender Fluid is a gender identity best described as a dynamic mix of boy and girl. A person who is Gender Fluid may always feel like a mix of the two traditional genders, but may feel more boy some days, and more girl other days. Being Gender Fluid has nothing to do with which set of genitalia one has, nor their sexual orientation.
