Writer looking to better understand FTM

If a character is FTM, that makes them a transgender man, not a transgender woman. If you have any questions I'd be happy to help out though.

 

What might also help you are vids on youtube. You might look up a few keywords.

 

Well do you want your character to feel completly male inside, or have days where they feel male or female, in which this case they would be genderfluid. If you want your character to be ftm(transman), then your character has to acknowledge that they identify as male. People suffering from gender dysphoria hate being called their bio sex pronouns. They feel their body parts alienate them from who genderwise, they feel they actually are.

Speaking from experience, and what others can go through as well, gender dysphoria is very distressing. One can feel very misplaced in society, like they don't belong. Mentally and spirituly I am a guy, not so much physically. It's a sad situation to be in and it completly sucks being a guy stuck in a female body.

If you have any further questions, please feel free to message me.

 

No worries.

Different people realize they're trans in different ways, and at different times in their life. For me, I didn't realize until I was about 20. I didn't know that female individuals could be transgender - where I grew up, it's kind of sheltered, and very white, and heteronormative, and upper middle class, so my entire concept of trans people was centered around transwomen. That doesn't mean that up until that point in my life everything was peachy and I was ok with being a girl. I always had this feeling in the back of my mind that I was different somehow, and I've always had issues with my body. It just took me a while to figure out why.

Just like how people realize they're trans differently, people experience their trans identities differently. One thing a lot of trans people experience is gender dysphoria, which is something that manifests, in simplest terms, as a discomfort with ones assigned gender. For me, gender dysphoria is mainly physical, and partially social. It bothers me that my body is the way that it is, and isn't more male looking - in fact, it's sometimes painful, physically painful, like this ache in my chest and in my guts, sort of like a grief. The things that bother me the most are my chest, my voice, and my hips. But it's different for everyone. Socially, what gets to me is being perceived as female. Little things, like being called miss or ma'am, or people saying "ladies first" just frustrate me. It's doubly frustrating because what they do that bothers me they do because they're trying to be polite.

It took me a while to feel like I could talk with anyone about it, but I slowly started coming out to friends. I started with my open-minded lgbt friends, assuming they'd understand better or at least be willing to learn more rapidly. I still don't feel comfortable addressing this with my family, but I'm starting to feel like it's time I try to do it.

There's a lot of misconceptions about trans people. One being that they're super gay, so gay that they decided to switch genders. Which is crazy, there are trans people of all orientations. When it comes to orientation though, it's a persons true gender that should be referred to, not their assigned gender. A transman (ftm) that likes women would be straight, not a lesbian - being a lesbian implies that two women are involved. A transwoman (mtf) that likes women, however, would be a lesbian, because she's just as much a woman as a cisgender (not transgender) woman. A misconception about trans guys in particular is that they're misogynistic. But I and many trans guys I know are keen on women's issues - just because we're switching that doesn't mean we hate or devalue women, we're just not women on the inside. Another misconception about trans guys is that we're all very butch. Some of us are. I know a transguy that wears backwards trucker hats and sags his baggy pants and watches sports and drinks beer and is in every imaginable way a dudebro. But some of us, like myself, aren't particularly butch. I absolutely would not sag my pants, have no interest in sports, and much prefer mixed drinks and fruity wine coolers to beer. Expression doesn't equal identity, and trans guys are as diverse as cis guys.

Post any more questions you have.

 

To better understand someone who's FTM, I would suggesting getting to know one of us. If you become a full member, I'll be more than happy to chat with you at length via personal message.

I am very into reading books about transguys and with trans characters. It's amazing that you are doing this!