Sometimes I get confused about dysphoria. Sometimes I think I experience it, like when I wake up from an arousing dream and try to play with certain parts that aren't there, looking at my yeti body and getting sad that I could never pass as a girl. But then I read stories about depression and even mutilation and realize that I really can't compare to that.
You do not have to self-harm or be depressed about your body to have dysphoria. I have dysphoria that makes me uncomfortable in social settings and my breast dysphoria is caused because of the social dysphoria. But neither make me want to self-harm or make me depressed. There are many different levels that dysphoria can be at, and mine just happens to be fairly moderate. The worst I would do is cry and be sad for a day, then the sadness may go away the next day.
I would say that everyone experiences dysphoria a bit differently. I know some people who have an outwards, panic attack like dysphoria, and for me, it's a very deep and internalized feeling. When I feel dysphoric, I get just this really awful feeling of uncomfortable emotional pain, and a sort of small internalized panic attack. But some others experience it more severely, or more moderately.
It's hard to describe. Everyone deals with and reacts to it differently For me, it's getting worse. It's like, a feeling of being trapped. Of wanting to rip these parts you don't want off of your body.. Like a torturing, crushing feeling. When you look in the mirror, you want to smash it because you see something that isn't you. You think "I want out of this body.." and "I want to change it right now" I don't cry, or really show emotion that much at all. So I don't sit there weeping for hours. But I do experience what I mentioned above.
The panicky suffocating feeling you get from wearing skirts. Had to wear one yesterday and it was awful.
Dysphoria is different for everybody. Just because yours is mild doesn't mean it isn't valid. For me it's very emotional, very heavy. It'll just come over me, and I end up feeling anxious and disconnected from my body and angry. So angry. I don't anymore because I've come to terms with myself and pinpointed the cause, but I used to self-harm when I got dysphoric because it's all I felt I could do, it calmed me down. I hate it when it happens, it comes on so fast and it just hurts, like being punched in the gut...
Thanks for the responses. I've always had this thing where I feel like a fake if my problems aren't as bad as somebody else.
Don't feel fake. We all have different ways of experiencing elements of the human experience. Be thankful that your dysphoria, while real and valid, isn't as bad as some individuals!