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What Things Do/Did You Do To Feel More "Aligned"

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by eofox, Sep 27, 2014.

  1. eofox

    Regular Member

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    So, I haven't really been able to be myself at all much recently, and have realized I might feel a bit better if I did some things to make myself feel more feminine or aligned, instead of trying to act a bit more edgy and a little more aggressive I guess. Anyway, for a while I've felt just kind of disconnected from myself and everything around me, kind of like I'll see something I used to like doing, and some part of me still does, but now it's kind of just confusion because all my mind can think about is I should be enjoying something that I just can't bring myself to enjoy, much less think about.

    Sorry for rambling, my question was just what do you do or what did you do to kind of make your inner self happy or satisfied. I'm obviously not really out yet, so this is kind of a question for things you can do under the surface or minor changes of appearance that isn't necessarily noticeable or generally cared about. My thoughts have had a lot of problems coexisting recently to the point I think I've switched the meaning of just about every sentence I've written about half way through... Making everything just a jumbled mess that just kind of has been frustrating me.

    Anyways, feel free to answer whether you are mtf, ftm, or anything in between or otherwise.
     
  2. Acm

    Acm Guest

    I try to copy male body language like walking and sitting, it makes me feel better. Also any clothing I have that is more masculine I like to wear (like I have some shoes that are meant for girls but they look pretty guy-ish and they make my feet look big so I like them), I like to shave my face so that I can feel the hair growing back like stubble, I stopped shaving my legs+arm pits, playing as male characters in video games and getting to be called my male name online is nice too
     
  3. NingyoBroken

    NingyoBroken Guest

    What I assume you mean by aligned, is having your body match what you feel on the inside. And in that case, I am never fully aligned. I bind, and that helps.

    But not until at least top surgery, will I feel aligned.

    As for masculine things and such, well I do love to break gender roles.
    For a while I tried to be hyper-masculine, I guess. I bought T shirts and guy's pants and wore them. And don't get me wrong, those are great. Especially for lazy days.

    But I love that (quite effeminate) Visual Kei look way too much to give it up. I feel comfortable with those clothing, it's more me. I've realised that now.

    I've tried to learn how to skateboard, just to seem more dude-like.
    But I've learned it's not for me, I'd rather be drawing or writing songs.

    There is no need to try and fit into gender roles. There is no need to force yourself into doing something you don't like or is just not for you. And there is certainly no need to stop doing what you like just because it's not stereotypical of the gender you identify as. It doesn't make you less of that gender.

    I'm glad to be a pretty boy, myself. ^^
     
  4. WillowRose

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    I suppose that any answer to this would be very specific to the individual, but here's what has worked for me:

    Learning how to tuck, and doing it daily

    Wearing a light sports-style bra under my guy clothes (no way I can present female at work). There's nothing for the bra to hold (yet), but it still just feels soothing to me.

    Consistently sitting down to pee.

    I'm fortunate that my finances and schedule allowed me to start laser facial hair removal. For me, that was a concrete "first step" I could take towards eventual transition.
     
  5. eofox

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    I tuck most days. Haven't stood up to pee in... maybe a couple years now?

    Haven't tried the sports bra thing, that sounds like a wonderful idea though.

    Finances are coming along, but still need a couple months before I can even move out comfortably. So, it's just a lot of saving at the moment. I've also been trying to grow out my hair, just trying to figure out how to keep it looking good without having to look in the mirror too much...

    Thanks for the sports bra idea, I'll definitely be trying it out soon.
     
  6. Kasey

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    Well...

    Since I moved back down to my apartment...

    Shaved my legs, armpits and arms. Wear skirts bare legged and am unafraid to wear high heels... despite already being just over 6 feet tall. In fact, I've been complimented on my height.

    Also I'm very much in love with makeup now. Maybe because I'm getting good at it.
     
  7. RaveOnSpaceboy

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    I work out, which is kind of uncharacteristic as I'm not an athletic person, despite always being toned/muscular.
    I started a shadow boxing-type routine with weights, and it tones my biceps, bulks and defines my shoulders, and bulks up my traps, which is nice.
    Being able to see my body look slightly more masculine has helped with coping.
    Also shaving. I started shaving my face to A, get rid of the infamous peach fuss, and B, to roughen the skin to a more male look. But in addition feeling the hair grow back, and having my face feel a bit s*****y after a few days is really nice.
    I also measured my hips and shoulders, and was really happy to find that it wasn't an illusion, my shoulders are naturally broader than my hips. This makes me happy, because when I go on testosterone I will definitely acquire that V shaped torso that I always wanted.
     
  8. Nekoko

    Regular Member

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    I dunno, I don't do much, I often get friends to indulge me with cute feminine nicknames. Shaving my armpits have helped me feel more feminine, sometimes I take cute selfies when I find a good angle and marvel at how feminine my face actually is. (not to brag I've just always looked a lot like my mom) My favorite thing to do is shake my hips~ I Actually like to dance but I'm really self conscious so when I'm alone and listening to the right music I'll dance shaking my hips and just having fun. I also say my name outloud, that makes me really happy~!