So, as you see, I am 13. My mother does not know yet that I'm genderfluid. I really want to fully transition to a boy to show my mom, but I need to bind my chest. I've been trying to loose weight; starving myself, taking long walks, exercising, dancing, etc.. It hasn't really worked. I have limited resources to make my own: tape, old stretchy shirts, needles, and thread. I've tried making one several times and failed. I did use ACE bandages at one point, but I lost it trying to hide it from my mom. ACE, I noticed, has very bad reviews. But it worked perfectly for me that time, I could breathe and it didn't hurt or leave marks. I've also tried using 2 sports bras, but that didn't work either! How can I bind my chest? This is eating at me so badly, it's making me miserable and depressed. :help:
In my honest opinion I would say come out to your mother. Not an easy thing, but I'll give the best scenario considering all options go perfectly. You're 13, which means you haven't fully developed yet. If binding is hard now, it'll get worse. Really if you do plan on transitioning partly or later more the best course is to come out, see a doctor, and if all goes well go on some sort of staller. That way you aren't hard committing. Everyone in life unless they choose to live through an earthly hell and are able to hide it for all time; will have to come out sooner or later. By being young you have the advantage that your family has known you for a shorter amount of time. For myself, trying to convince my family I'm trans and bi at 25 feels like a nightmare since they have known me for what feels like a lifetime. You have time on your side. Anyways, past that I can't really help. In my experience, tight clothes, sports bras, and professional binders are the way to go, but if not then baggy clothes and layers. Goodluck!
I came across this site a long time ago and I think it might be helpful for you. In a Bind | TransActive Gender Center This is a place where people who aren't able (for whatever reason) to have access to a binder can get them for free. They are donated and are of good quality. I would suggest contacting them. Also, the service is specifically for people under 21 so they should be able to help you and they have a section specifically for coming out with tips and guides to help you. .
Sorry you're feeling so bad. (*hug*) I agree that if you want to fully transition you should come out to your parents, as it's going to be very hard for you to do so without their consent. You say you're gender fluid, so I'm not sure if you'd be interested in puberty blockers? I take them and they come as a shot once a month. They stop periods and further breast growth, as well as increase of any other female secondary sex characteristics. They can be quite pricey (over $400 a shot), but hopefully your parents would have a health care plan that covers it. If you don't mind me asking, how big is your chest? If you have an A cup or less a sports bra or two probably works fine. I know that I'm often too hard on myself when binding thinking I don't look flat when others say I do. Also don't starve yourself! I also tried that method so my chest would look smaller and it doesn't work. If anything exercise and eat healthy, but don't starve yourself! Good luck with everything, and feel free to add/message me if you want to talk. ride:
I am sorry that you are miserable and depressed. Starving yourself and over-exercising wont necessarily help you loose weight. Your body will consume fat and muscle at a ratio of 3:2 or so, which means that you will end up in the hospital before a significant amount of fat has been lost. To loose weight, it is best to (1) not starve yourself and (2) avoid sugars and complex carbs like bread. Aerobic exercise might cause you to gain weight in the long run depending on your diet (or what you eat as a result of the increase in appetite that will result from exercising). If you want to transition to male, it might be a better idea to increase your protein intake and pursue weight training to help bulk up your arms and shoulders a bit. I agree with what others said about ordering a binder, seeing about coming out, pursuing puberty blockers, etc.. I wish you the best.
