Although I have had feminine qualities, I had always been comfortable with my skin. I found it important to have both feminine and masculine qualities although I always hated the way men think, talk and act most of the time. but off late I have been very confused about my gender. I have been hating that I have certain parts and features while missing a lot of vital parts and features that need to be there to complete me. I especially hate the sight and the feeling of the male genitalia. I am dying in this agony. It seems every day I am fighting this feeling's and every moment that goes by I am trying to gasp for air :tears:. This really gets worse when I see other women as I get this feeling that I want to be like them and not the hideous person that I look like. there is no way I can talk about this at home as I come from a conservative Indian family. I don't have any sort of courage or strength in me to talk to them about this. Even if my parents were to magically agree the society that I come from literally launch a barge of condescending and bigoted comments. At the current rate I am not sure how long I will be able to make it. The only option I can come up with right now is just to run away and disappear from everything I have known all my life to a very far away place. But at the moment that is also not possible as I need to get treatment for my trigeminal neuralgia. I don't know what to do. Any advise on what to do or how to cope? :help:
Try, meditation, just relax and think of the girl you want to be. Mayb try sneaking in girls clothing and secretly wearing it, also try using a gaff under ur clothing to secretly hide ur male genitalia. Hope everything turns out okay Love and eternity, Anastasia.
I'm in a similar place right now. I've found some solace in taking time to just explore being me while I'm home alone. I wear women's clothes, shave my legs, paint my toes, etc., and that makes me feel a little more congruent with myself. In public I've started wearing seamless boy shorts under bicycle shorts so no one can tell that I'm wearing them. I still do feel like I'm in hiding, but I'm paralyzed with fear at the thought of disclosing this part of my life to anyone. Even so exploring this part of who I am has helped me cope with it a bit, and I'm no where near as depressed as I once was. I'm now more teetering on the edge, but I suppose it's better than nothing.
For me it's the other way around, but I found wearing guy's clothes and boxers really helped....maybe try doing that but with girl's clothes....? I know it gets bad but we have to keep fighting! Stay strong. Love and Yellow Skittles, Gabriel xxx
