I'm just wondering if anyone else gets this, it's really confuzzling me? I find it hard to imagine myself as 100% male, body an mind. It's very hazy and all over the place. But when I can, it's feels really good. Like euphoria and happiness and calm feelings. But a few minutes later I start to feel sick and nauseous. Sometimes it will be dysphoria, triggered by seeing my reflection, or my voice or something. But other times it just happens randomly, and when I think to myself, "yeah you're a boy" it feels really good, but I still feel really nauseous at the same time. I don't know how it happens, I think it might be like I'm SO happy that I feel sick, or maybe it's the shock from my brain truly believing my mind and body are male, or maybe it's a sign that I'm on the wrong path/doing something wrong? I havnt ever heard anyone else experience this, wondering if you wonderful people might have?
Could be you are more genderfluid or genderqueer, instead of all the way trans. Although with hormones and puberty, it could just be normal 9although weird-feeling) teenage stuff going on.
Maybe it's dysphoria mixing with the euphoria you feel? If you feel that happy imagining a male body then it still sounds like you're trans to me
it's just really hazy and unclear trying to imagine my body differently. I know that my mind expects my body to be different from how it is, but its so all over the place, I can't tell exactly what it should look like. It feels like it changes every three seconds. I think this confusion could be contributing to the weird nauseous feelings, but guess its something I need to dig really deep into. Thanks for the ideas guys!
I don't know if I'm interpreting this right but it sounds like something I can relate to. Sometimes, I imagine myself as being male bodied like having muscles and facial hair and it feels great and I feel really calm. But then sometimes, only a few seconds later I feel sick at the thought and other times, I will imagine I'm male and I'll only feel nauseous and fearful.
I think I get a similar feeling- it's more of an uncomfortable kind of nauseous when my body isn't matching when I think it should be. I also agree that it changes sometimes! Sometimes I can pick out parts of myself that I think are more masculine as well as wearing more masculine clothes, and then I am able to see myself male-bodied, and I feel really happy. Then it slips up and I feel like crap again.
