I don't mean this in a mean way but I'd like to understand identities that aren't necessarily related to being a man or a woman. I've had struggles with dysphoria in the past so I know what it's like to feel like you should be the opposite sex and so things like flipping between being your birth gender and the opposite one I have a frame of reference for. What I don't have a frame of reference for is things like not feeling like any gender or stuff like that that isn't based around being male or female. Is it like having dysphoria about your own sex but at the same time not wanting to be the opposite? Or what?
It's really difficult to explain and it also differs from person to person. So for me, when I get referred to as a "girl" in anyway something inside me "twangs", it feels wrong and off and weird. I do get dsyphoria as well, although really mild in my case, it's usually directed towards my 'cultural genitalia' (the stuff you can see/hear that allows you to identify gender). In the same sense, when I've thought about "what if" I transitioned, I feel like it would be the same. I'd still feel wrong being referred to as a "boy" (although probably less often than "girl" bugs me) and I'd miss my boobs sometimes tbh. Generally I don't want to change my body at all, at least not permenantly. Hope that helps?
I agree with CJliving, it really depends on the person. For me I don't exactly experience dysphoria, but I cringe when people say, “I’m such a beautiful young lady,” I feel sick to my stomach when people call me "sweetie", and I feel guilty when my parents call me “daughter.” When I look in the mirror I don't see any specific gender, I just see my face and think, “Oh person in a relatively pretty body,” there’s almost a slight disconnect that the image reflected is me. Of course I recognize it and know that it is me; it’s just I don’t see my body as female; I see it as genderless. That's how I’ve seen myself my entire life. If I had grown up in a boy's body, I'd probably feel about the same level of discomfort that I do now, maybe a bit more, but thats hard to know. Also, when checking off boxes on official forms for gender I put down female out of the two, but usually my thought process is, "well I guess, its sort of correct there’s no middle option so female it is.” I really don't feel that attached to the gender I was assigned. I hope this gives you more insight
I've always hated being called a 'lady,' 'sweetie' or anything similar as it just feels wrong and my whole life I've been a tomboy. I feel like I fit more with the boys, but the only body change I'd make is no 'hourglass curves' and no boobs. And I've never really seen a gender in the mirror.
I'm gonna be the odd one out and say that I do get pretty bad dysphoria and am thinking of getting some of the more minor cosmetic surgeries associated with transitioning to make it less easy to read me as a guy. Most of my discomfort is around the fact that people are reading me as a guy and it can trigger pretty bad feelings when people misgender me or act like I should act in a certain way because I'm biologically male (ie lifting heavy stuff, taking charge in certain situations, pissing contests). I also get pretty uncomfortable because I feel that people don't take my gender seriously because its not something they're used to, like people who identify as fully woman or man. When it is a really serious thing for me that I am not a woman or a man.
