Mom just told me how to dress for the Christmas gathering

I'm sorry my mom makes me dress girly when I'm more comfortable dressing more "boyish" so I sorta understand where you're coming from... although obviously not on that level. I hope it gets better for you

 

Well you might think about dress pants for women
I like dress pants because they feel very soft... and there are cuts which are at least neutral, if not feminine.
You might think about a button down shirt... there are neutral or feminine versions, too...

and maybe you could relax a bit and enjoy the holidays, just as a nice time...
I refuse to be triggered any more, remaining relaxed and still telling your opinion is possible
otherwise its just old patterns...

wish you a nice time...


(*hug*)

 

I can understand you there. My mum wont let me go shopping on my own anymore. She tells me what i cant wear and sometimes asks me to wear more makeup. Ita aweful because its like shes ashamed of me. there are a few things you can do though. More feminine or gender neutral print shirts work well. You can look masc/femme/neutral by changing your hairstyle, subtle makeup and mannerisms. It is just for christmas, but i know christmas is a time you want to be happy by being yourself, but what you wear doesnt change who you are. Chin up, we are here for you :0

 

"Oh! I picked out this beautiful blue dress for you to wear for blah blah blah!" Dress turns out to be skin-tight and makes my ass look gigantic and boobs look big even though I've barely got lumps. I feel you, Adrienne.

 

One idea. Tell her that her idea and your idea of what to wear are far apart. Some sort of compromise is needed, and since neither clothing option will work, you'll simply wear nothing... :badgrin:

OK...I wouldn't really suggest actually wearing nothing...

 

... A fig leag will do nicely :icon_wink

Seriously, wear whatever you want and have a good laugh at her. Why not... It migh be christmas, but it's still your life.

 

That sounds crap.

Sounds to me like you've got 3 options.

1. You go along with what your mum has asked for the sake of an easy life. (When I say easy, I know how dysphoric it is. I just mean easy as in avoiding conflict etc with your family)

2. You turn up dressed how you want but prepared for the fallout.

3. You look for a compromise such as women's trousers and shirt for example.

 

Mmmm yea...

Let's just say this exact point of contention is where I will not be going home for the summer.

I know those feels sis.

 

My mom got upset at me once and told me that I "looked like a dyke", I forget what it was that set her off. Thanks, mom.

I feel your pain. She takes me shopping before things like weddings to make sure I get something appropriate, and I go along with it, because I dislike making a scene.

 

Depending on whether you're willing to deal with your mother's (and possibly other) response(s), wear a woman's dress pants and a women's sweater I'd say.

That or tell her how you feel and that you won't dress in contradiction to that.
This is far less serious and not gender related, but my mother has been trying, for years, to get me to wear dress shirts. With lines. Like these:

Hate how they feel and don't like the look for myself either.
Again, nowhere near as serious as your situation, but I can sort of relate.

Hope you'll be able to convince your mother one way or the other.
Lot's of support from me! (*hug*)

 

My family never says anything when my clothes are more feminine, but are always sure to tell me how great I look when I'm wearing guy clothes.

 

Well, she only said dressy pants and a sweater, that's a lot of wiggle room if you ask me! I don't know much about your personal fashion sense but there are a lot of different kinds of clothes you could wear under this criteria that would look feminine~ It's passive aggressive but she started it!

Maybe something like this: V28® Women Polo Neck Knit Stretchable Elasticity Long Sleeve Slim Sweater Jumper at Amazon Women

or this?: Kensie Women's Fair Isle Twofer Sweater at Amazon Women

The first is just cute and I think would go great with dress pants, the second is a bit more festive especially the red, though I like the black better personally but hey, that's me!

This is really cute I think!: Kensie Women's Cozy Mixed Media Zipper Sweater, String Combo, Small at Amazon Women

This isn't my style but it looks nice: PattyBoutik Collar V Neck Button Pockets Ribbed Sweater at Amazon Women

as for pants, well, I think that should be pretty easy, something form fitting would be nice but find something you like that works... I'm sure you don't need my advice though xD Just throwing out ideas! ^^

 

I think this is a great idea. Especially in Wine, though the Khaki and Blue were nice too

 

I'm sorry to hear that Do you think you could find a middle ground and find pants/sweater that are more obviously feminine? Then if she asks, you could say 'Well this -is- what you asked me to wear."

 

Yeah, that one is my favorite! xD I want one of those sweaters myself! (next paycheck I think~)

 

Unfortunately, it looked like they are all too small for me. I was looking at ordering one.

 

Fair point actually, probably wouldn't fit me either, but still, that's the great thing about the internet~ There's always more places to look for something similar :3

 

(*hug*) Ugh I have been there my dad is trying to guilt trip me into re-piercing my ears by saying I am hurting my mom/grandmother/my little sister I don't haves guinea pig by not wearing them. Try maybe a pink button down or a more feminine button down. Here are some links
Chaps Plaid Shirt - Women's
Dana Buchman Pintuck Blouse - Women's
This may not be popular but depending on your grandmothers age (ie if she is elderly) you should remember that she is from a different generation that did not have the openness that ours does when it comes to nonbinary genders and gender preference and there not likely going to change there thoughts at this point in there lives. It sucks trust me I know. Try to come to a common ground such as wearing trousers but a feminine shirt. Or feminine trousers and male shirt etc.

 

My god some of those are so damn cute