First a Girl, Now a Boy... Wish I Were Still a Girl?

Only you can know what you are. Go with what feels like truly you, not what is expected by society or what is "easier".

 

You might look up threads on genderfluid or androgynous people... for example
http://emptyclosets.com/forum/gender-identity-expression/152580-genderfluid-hrt-transition.html#2

and here:
http://www.gires.org.uk/assets/DOH-Assets/pdf/doh-transgender-experiences.pdf
They talk of it having biological causes. meaning its not just a whim ...
What I do not like is on page 7 talking about stress... its not what all people have experienced, and some experience relief...


Really take your time... and ask here if you have questions, people will support you...

You might chat with others via wall messages...

and you might talk to a gender therapist, a counselor from school or someone from an lgbt center... there might even be support groups...


(*hug*)

 

Hello there! I get what you're saying, I really do. As a genderfluid, mostly male person (actually starting to question if I'm fully FTM and just don't want to let go of my "girl" side) It's pretty annoying. Because I really want to be girl. I want to be comfortable wearing dresses, make up talking about the same stuff as my girl friends... But I cant. Because it feels wrong doing it. It feels like a lie, a big fat lie that I really want to live. But I'm starting to accept that now.

If I understand it right, you want to be a girl, just like me, but feel more like a boy, like I do. But you're a biologically male? It seems like we're both utterly confused...

I would love to get to know you. Would you mind talking with me via wall messages?

 

Just click on username->View Public Profile
there you can chat via wall messages.

 

You cannot privately message someone unless you are a full member.
And, you can't publicly share your Facebook or other social network account

 

Sadly, we can't tell you if you are cis, or trans, or genderfluid, or anything else. I definitely think talking to a gender therapist would help though.

My question is, why did you feel happier when you wanted to be a girl? Now you don't feel like a girl, but want to. This probably isn't unheard of, although I have never come across it. Just trying to understand. Did you feel freer as a girl? More able to express yourself? Women, in general, do get a tad more leeway when it comes to gender-non conformity. Women can wear pants, men still really can't wear dresses. It's misogynistic as hell, basically saying men are better, so if a woman/girl are more manly than that's okay. But anyway.

Or maybe you know you aren't 100% male, so any break from that relieves some dysphoria? (That's how I realized I was genderfluid.)

As for transition, if you still aren't sure, maybe a (possibly temporary) transition to using "they/theirs" pronouns would make you feel like you are in the works. That way you can say "Okay, I am not sure what I am. But I might not be all guy, so let's go with this till I figure it out." Not having people take you seriously is aggravated, especially when you want to come out, but are unsure of what you are yet. Having to come out multiple times or even just tweaking could cause people around you to not even bother to try and understand. Like "Oh, it doesn't matter if he's trying to use neutral or female pronouns, they are just going to change it again." This is something a therapist could help with, and could help you realize what's going on.