Hi friends!! So, the other day I was on my Facebook, changing my pronouns to be a bit more neutral. They let you change your pronouns, all they ask is that you label yourself in some way, such as being transgender male, genderfluid, etc. So, I was looking through the list of terms they offered, googling some of their definitions because some I had not heard of before. I came across one called Gender Non-conformity that peaked my curiosity. So I did a bit of research on it. Gender-nonconformity, also known as gender variance, is behavior that doesn't match a person's gender roles set by society. That got me intrigued, as I feel like I could identify as that, here's why: - I love dressing up in feminine clothing and adding female clothing to my wardrobe. - I've worn clothes of the opposite gender out in public, including once at school. - I'm admittedly too lazy/cheap/unmotivated to invest in making myself pass as a female. - I already identify as non-conformist politically and religiously. - I'm bi-sexual/pansexual, so I don't conform to liking one gender either. -I don't want to transition into being female. While I do wish I was simply born a girl or could turn into a girl at will, I still want to keep my male life around. - I don't mind being referred to as "he" but I can't stand being referred to as a "man" - I dislike most stereotypical male activities and life choices -I like painting my nails, although I've always hidden it up to this point. -I personally believe society would be a lot better if gender roles didn't exist. So yeah, that's kinda what I'm thinking about right now. Do any of you have any comments or thoughts, or know where I can find more people in the same boat as me? Thanks!
I emphasize pretty hard with you in a lot of ways, I also can't politically/religiously conform with a good conscience. When it comes to gender I have to question my motivations in wanting people to perceive me as a girl. Because with that perception comes all the loaded assumptions people inevitably make when you tell them you belong to one group or the other. So yeah, I can totally get why you'd wanna consider yourself a gender non-conformist! Even though I tend to think of my persona within the gender binary of male and female, I wouldn't want to conform to all the common tropes of one gender. I am curious though, when you talk about wishing you were simply born a girl or could turn into a girl at will, but still want to keep your male life around, what exactly do you mean by your "male life?" Do you mean you'd still like people to perceive you as a guy even if you could turn into a girl? Or do you mean that turning into a girl means there are certain "guy things" you don't think you'd be able to do as a girl?
My male life has school, a job, friends, and family I've invested 19 years into building that up, I don't just want to throw it away. If I were to become a girl now it would be somewhat of a secret identity. I'd live a second life as a second person pretty much. So that way I would have the best of both worlds in a way. I wouldn't have to come out to anyone, and I wouldn't have to go through all the struggles of transitioning.
Gender non-conformist is not a gender. It is someone who does not conform to the stereotypes of their gender, and breaks gender roles. I am also a gender non-conformist. I identify as male (though I should note I am transsexual), however I enjoy dressing up and doing makeup; crossdressing. This to me, is an art form, is creating a graceful and beautiful character. However I am a male, nothing more. If you by any chance, feel you do not identify with your birth sex (or the opposite sex), you are probably an androgyne or genderqueer.
I agree. I mean, I'll still live certain aspects of my life as though I'm male, but I'm adopting non-conformity as a way of life. I'll be a guy in a dress, because screw what other people think
I would agree that "gender nonconformist" is not a gender in itself. Maybe "Male (nonconforming)" would be a bit more accurate. But of course, you're welcome to label yourself however you choose. I think defying gender roles is awesome you should totally rock being a guy in a dress!
I suppose it is kind of mis-leading that facebook offers it as a "gender alternative" from the regular gender binary. Their definition might differ a bit from ours. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt, LGBT has a lot of pretty specific terms.
