Personal Gender = Sexual Turn-On?

I do think there is some overlap. I get slight arousal from sexual fantasies, when I imagine myself as a submissive boy. The role from when I identified as a girl didn't change, but imagining myself as a boy makes me feel... "Correct," in a way. I don't know how to explain it.

On the other hand, when I am in an aroused state my chest arouses me even more because I inagine it as someone else's... But when I am not in that state, it just gives me dysphoria. Another reason I want it gone... I don't want to be aroused by my own body parts as if they were someone else's.

 

It's probably a comfort thing. I have trouble even envisioning myself dating right now because I am very uncomfortable of the idea of my body being in any romantic or sexual situation. But I love the idea of being male bodied and being in that situation.

 

I personally wouldn't do any "stuff" without some kind of binding on.because otherwise it would just be a body but not me if you get what i mean

 

Once the light bulb went off in my head and I started allowing myself to act and dress in a more masculine manner, my confidence went up.

Now that I am the initiator and the 'roles' switched, my libido and comfort level with cuddling has gone way up. Now I am the one who puts my arm over his shoulders, he lays his head in my lap, I am the big spoon, etc. Before, any touch was fraught with tension. Now it's much more comfortable and natural.

Now that he is calling me by my male name and complimenting me in ways such as 'handsome', I am swelling with pride and feeling attractive rather than uncomfortable.

This is only the beginning for me, but I have felt instantly more attractive, touchable, and responsive once I am allowing myself to express in the right way, and he is giving me tons of positive feedback that he really likes it, not just doing it to make me happy.

 

I actually thought I was asexual before I came out to myself as trans. I just couldn't get aroused in any way while imagining myself as female. Now that I accepted myself...let's just say I'm no where even *close* to being ace.

Ugh, I can relate. I get really anxious when I think about dating and involving myself in any kind of romantic and/or sexual activity because of how inadequate I feel my body is not just for me, but also for the other person...:icon_sad:

 

I thought I was a lesbian because the idea of being submissive in a sexual situation, or of a guy being attracted to me as a girl, made me sick. But when I imagine myself as a boy, being the dominant, that totally does it for me.

 

Me too, I thought I was asexual for a long time because I was so uncomfortable with my body and the idea of anything sexual involving myself.

Yeah I don't think I could ever do anything sexual or even date anyone if I wasn't living as male. I'd like to wait to start transitioning first.

 

I don't know if I'd say I get aroused being referred to or envisioning myself, as my identified gender. But I do feel a sort of tingling sensation, sometimes, when seeing women embracing their femininity. It can be simple things, like dancing or just the way they posture themselves, because it sends a signal to me that says, "I should be doing that..."

I feel more... relaxed... yeah... that'd be the best way to put it. The few times I watch pornography (and even then, I tend to skip the graphic parts; all about the foreplay and post-cuddling here), if a woman is involved, I always find myself empathizing with her body, her movement, her experience.

 

Like many others here, I always felt that I just "wasn't that into sex" but now I'm realizing that it's probably because of my gender. Definitely the chest is a big thing for me, I asked both of my previous boyfriends not to bother with it because it doesn't turn me on. But lately I've noticed that, when I'm wearing a binder, I play with my nipples a lot and like it. It was a lightbulb moment.

 

I feel very tempted to do the same, the truth is that I have tried and didn't worked. It seems I can't stay out of troubles for long, must be my reptilian brain...

Right now I'm making a compromise : As long as you get it right with my gender and don't touch wrong parts, I'll be cool with it. So everyone that is interested will make me automatically come out, in order to avoid any missunderstanding. If they agree, then we have a (hot) deal. If they don't... Well, it's bye-bye and aufwiedersehen.

Now, if you are seeing me as male, giving me compliments as male, and acting shy and nervous around me... You'll see the beast unleash his claws, 'cause this is a major turn on for me. And if you are a girl, or a woman... I'll make sure you won't forget it.

I'm also doing extremely submissive men. For some reason I miss it even more than when I'm with girls. I don't know, maybe it's because I know how to keep girls (very) happy without it (knowledge is power), while with men I need to put something there, and I'd rather put the right thing (and feel the sensations).

Short answer... I used to be very raw and dominant sexually speaking, but there was always something pulling the brakes. Now that the stuff is gone (well, most of it), sex is much better : There is no need to stop anything, no need to recoil and invent any excuse for my weird behaviour. And I feel way more self confident, which shows everywhere.