I am a transgender male. Wow, 1st time I've ever said that. That's beside the point. I was thinking of getting pregnant to try and change who I am, but now I'm thinking about having kids in the long run. I do want to have kids. And I'm wondering if before I do anything if I should get pregnant before having any surgery done. But the idea of getting pregnant makes me feel sick to my stomach. What should I do?
That's up to you. I've thought about having a biological kid with my partner (we're both trans guys) and I'd be the one who would carry since he has medical issues, but now I don't know. Adoption is always on the table.
If just the thought of it makes you sick to your stomach, it would be a bad idea. Is it important to you that your children are biologically related to you? If not, adoption is, as the others have said, always an option.
Having a child to change who you are is never a good idea. The reason for having a child should be purely because you want to start a family/bring life into the world. If the thought of getting pregnant makes you sick, then I think that it's obvious that it is something that you should not be doing. It's one of those things you can't take back once it's done. (Not that there aren't options, but it has emotional setback, of course) Just think carefully on it and don't rush yourself. Go with what your heart is telling you. If starting a biological family is a priority, then it's something to consider, as others have said. If not, there are a lot of wonderful children out there for adoption who need awesome parents. I'm sorry for your dilemma either way. What an awful situation to be in. :c I hope that the answer comes to you. Perhaps try talking it out with your partner? (If applicable, since you didn't mention anyone) I wish you the best, truly. Stay safe and take care of yourself, yes?
If having a biological child is important to you, you can try IVF and have a surrogate pregnancy. Although adopting is always a choice, with possibly less problems. Don't try to force yourself to be something you are not, no matter what. It will hurt you more than you can ever think.
Adoption is very difficult and takes a long time. IVF is extremely expensive. As a new mom, I can confirm that pregnancy is very hard. But having a new born is way more difficult than all of that combined! If you really want kids, you need to be prepared for all of the good and bad that come with it. My pregnancy was terrible, but I am still glad to have my baby. She is so fantastic, if not exhausting.
My partner and I had a bit of a weird situation. I'm a transfemale and she's transmasculine (though she still prefers female pronouns) and we had a biological child just last year. It was really strange for us both, BUT we both said we'd do it again.
Transgender couple prepare telling children that their father is actually their mother and vice versa | Daily Mail Online ---------- Post added 17th Mar 2015 at 01:32 AM ---------- Congratulations!
Why thank you. That said, any reason to get a child other than wanting to start a family and becoming a dedicated parent is not fair to the child and it's likely you'll end up hurting it more than helping it. Also remember that if the pregnancy is done the normal way, the father will be part of both of your lives forever, regardless of whether you split up or not.
