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Trans* friend and pronoun confusion

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by NamesNotJake, Mar 21, 2015.

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  1. NamesNotJake

    NamesNotJake
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    Location:
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    I have a friend who on their facebook says they are gender fluid, and perfer the pronoun They. But when they talk about themselves in conversation they always say He.

    I just don't know what to call them. I don't call them He and risk triggering dysphoria...
     
    #1 NamesNotJake, Mar 21, 2015
  2. Peacemaker

    Peacemaker
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    i think you should just ask them themselves what pronouns they want to you use
     
    #2 Peacemaker, Mar 21, 2015
  3. Jellal

    Jellal
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    If you don't know what pronouns to use, just ask your friend. Ask nicely and if you get a bad response it is your friend who's being insensitive.
     
    #3 Jellal, Mar 21, 2015
  4. fragileflame

    fragileflame
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    I think you should just as them, or just use the pronoun they. That always seems to be a safe bet if you are too nervous to ask.
     
    #4 fragileflame, Mar 21, 2015
  5. baconpox

    baconpox
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    Gender:
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    Just ask them, I don't think most trans people would mind it.
     
    #5 baconpox, Mar 23, 2015
  6. Queero

    Queero
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    I'm sure they would rather you ask than use the wrong ones.
     
    #6 Queero, Mar 23, 2015
  7. BradThePug

    BradThePug
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    I would ask them politely what pronoun they prefer. "What is your preferred pronoun" is usually good phrasing for this question :slight_smile:
     
    #7 BradThePug, Mar 23, 2015
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