So, as most of you know I'm FTM trans, and I go by he/him pronouns. I was just curious if any of you, no matter your gender, has been a little, I don't really know the word... off-set by your pronouns? Meaning, I definitely feel dysphoric when someone calls me she/her pronouns, but then again, when I am called he/him, I feel a little disconnect with it, even though that's how I want to be referred to? I feel comfortable with he/him pronouns and everything, but right now, this early in my transition, it's a bit weird to me. Is it because I was used to a completely different set of pronouns my whole life, and now it's changing? Because I know that these are my correct pronouns and everything, but it makes me feel a bit anxious, and that something is wrong with my gender even though I know I'm a boy. He/him is the only thing that fits me, but right now it doesn't feel as natural as I thought, is what I'm trying to say. Any advice/similar experiences? :^)
It might be because you're not used to them, I've heard other guys say that before so I don't think it's totally uncommon. I don't feel uncomfortable with male pronouns personally but they always catch me off guard because I barely ever pass, so I'm not used to being called by the right pronouns.
It's probably just the unfamiliarity. If it's not that, it may be you feeling wrong because it still doesn't feel like you, which perhaps means you're non-binary or something. But it's likely just unfamiliarity. It does feel strange to be called what you feel is right, just because you've been called something different for all of your life.
Probably just that you've been used to hearing "she/her" your entire life, and now you're hearing something different.
It doesn't make me uncomfortable ; I consider it a pleasant surprise! For you, though , it's probably because you're not used to them yet.
obviously, I prefer female pronouns. Male pronouns don't tend to bother me too much, and from some people, female pronouns actually bother me, mostly because they seem to be either said mockingly, or are too forced. Or, there was the one time I was out shopping, the salesperson asked my preffered pronouns, I indicated female pronouns were preffered, she asked a co-worker for something, slipped and used male once, then tripped over her words appologizing. I'd rather she not called attention to it, that made me really uncomfortable.
I used to feel this way in the beginning, because I wasn't used to them. I've been addressed by female pronouns for 20 years. But now when more people are calling me by male pronouns, I use them in my head and pass more often it feels natural and completely normal. I get irritated when I hear female pronouns, especially from people I'm out to.
I actually get really annoyed when someone calls me by a feminine pronoun (especially girl....grrrr). I am not trans, but I feel like these pronouns go against who I am inside. I am still confused as to my gender. I see myself as more masculine in image in my head, but not masculine in identity. I guess the best fit is androgyne. Anyway, I'm off topic. The main point is yes, these things can be super annoying.
No, I definitely hate being called female and at this point will correct everyone and anyone who does. I want to be called male and make pronouns because that's what I am.
Thanks everyone! It's interesting to read all of your experiences. I think it's just the unfamiliarity. I am happy with being called he/him and that's what I prefer, and I hate it when I get called a girl, but now I have sort of numbed myself to it I guess... I know that he/him pronouns are right for me though, I guess it just catches me off guard sometimes because I'm so used to she/her!
