So I'm really really confused about my gender because I feel neither gender fluid, androgyne, or agender. I feel like male and female but somedays I feel more male than female and others I feel more female than male so it's almost like androgyne and gender fluid in one. I see androgynous people who say they're like 40% male, 60% female, for example but for me it's like I can be 75% female, 25% male one day and then 65% male, 35% female the next. I don't know what to think and I don't know if there's a definition for my GI right now and everyone says "take your time. You'll figure it out." but I think I may have already but I can't really find any explanation. Like some days I really wish I could just get rid of my breasts and others I'm really wishing they'd just grow more. I already cross-dress FTM but I look at dresses and stuff and think it's really pretty sometimes. One morning I could wake up wanting to WEAR boatloads of makeup but THINKING men's suits look cool and by the afternoon want to WEAR a suit and THINKING makeup is cool. Like I said before, I feel like androgyne and gender fluid mixed into one person! I already secretly consider myself having 2 names and depending on the day I prefer one over the other. Help?
The way I understand these identities... Bigender is that the person is either male or female at one time, not really identifying at both at the same time. Genderfluid is a scale, flowing between male and female. So, you could say, a fluid androgyne. Agender is no gender. You do sound genderfluid to me, because your range of male-ness and female-ness flows back and forth each day. Try not to think too much into the percentages of female and male, it gets really confusing that way and will possibly make you overthink. Of course, if you don't mind having a vague label, you could always go with genderqueer.
Please forgive my ignorance and/or offenciveness but... what exactly is bigender? Because I know bi means 2 so would that make it something close to androgyne? I'll try looking it up, it's hard to remember all the different kinds of identities. ---------- Post added 15th Apr 2015 at 11:34 PM ---------- Oh geez btw Tai you must have posted while I was typing so I didn't see yours till I was done ---------- Post added 15th Apr 2015 at 11:35 PM ---------- Ignore anything before this sentence then So anyway, again sorry if I come across as ignorant or offensive, but let me get this straight: gender fluid is being both genders, but sometimes one more than the other, am I right? And bigender is being one gender or another, depending on the moment? Sorry if this is confusing or makes no sense I have a lot of questions :/ and thanks for any and all help
like dylanv14 said you could be bigender with a preference to being a male, since it seems like you prefer masculinity (just going off of the crossdress FTM thing with that) and with bigender you identify as being both genders I also think you could be a demiboy. Again using the term boy because in my opinion it seems as the prevailing gender. With that, you identify anywhere between 50-100% boy and the rest as anything else (in your case most likely girl) (this is my personal case where I identify as partly female and partly androgynous) Gender orientations can change, so don't worry, it will all make sense to you eventually.
Bigender is something that is very possible, but it tends to be less fluid than you're explaining. It really sounds like you're describing a typical genderfluid sorta thing. But then again if nothing feels comfy for you, just say your nonbinary and let everything sort itself out. <3
Bigender can be used to mean changing between two genders or being both at once, depending on how you choose to use the term. You sound pretty typically genderfluid to me. Being genderfluid just means that your gender changes, and that can be between male, female, and anything in between (or agender).
OK.... it sounds right to me being gender fluid I guess. I can't know completely yet but by the way everyone is describing it that sounds like me. Thank you all for the help, especially getting all the definitions and explanations out of the way, cuz I'm pretty uneducated on this stuff.
It's fine to not know where you fit, there are lots of different terms being thrown at you and as long as you don't say anything purposely rude you should be fine. We are only really shown straight and cis people growing up, especially with gender identity, very little is it taught about or even spoken about. Hopefully this will continue to change for the better, but I didn't even know it was possible to be anything other than cis until I was probably 14 or so. I just thought I was insane. So welcome to EC, and don't worry.
Demigenders are starting to become more known these days, but there are more lesser known subcategories for demigenders, and that includes one called 'demifluid'. Basically, what demifluid means is that, while one part of your gender stays relatively stable (This part can be any gender, including androgyne), and with fluidity in the remaining part. I think this is pretty spot-on for you from what I hear, but what you choose to identify as is 100% up to you. Good luck, and I hope this helped.
Thank you both! Demigender seems very interesting in a way that maybe thats what I am I don't know but I'll figure it out eventually. OnyxPhantom I also saw your preferred name is Rowan I think that is an awesome name I always liked it and used it in video games and stuff . Right now I kind of, in a weird way go by 2 names. Nobody really knows how I feel about my gender but I have a girl name and a guy name and the only reason some call my guy name is this game we have where they call me that but I won't go into that part. I'd like to, when I've come out, be able to go back and forth between them but I don't know how that would work. :/
No problem, I'm happy to help. :] I find that just reading things/watching videos of what other trans* folk have to say helps a lot with figuring out your gender identity, and as other people have mentioned, there is no rush to find a specific label, it personally took me nearly a year to figure myself out, lol. And thanks, I've gone through countless pages of different names to find this one because I've always hated my birthname (I still do to this day), despite the fact that it is a "nice" name. For some reason the sound of it has always made me cringe inwardly and feel uncomfortable. I would have picked one of the names my mom/dad would have chosen for me/my sister if we were born boys, but I didn't like either of them (Bruce/Benjamin) at all, if not disliked them more than my current. As far as I can tell, Rowan is becoming very popular these days, but lucky for me, I've never met anyone with it irl so far (I am so thankful for this). It has been the only name that has jumped out to me (Out of my 10 favourites), although sometimes I have issues with the way some people pronounce it, but then again, it's not like I don't have the same issue with my current name. It's funny because every time I mention that I'm considering changing my name to Rowan, lots of people exclaim that it sounds like a "boy's name" (I'm not really out yet), despite the fact that it is a gender-neutral name. I was wondering if you have thought of taking a gender-neutral name, rather than two different ones? I think that it might confuse people if you went on with switching between two different names all the time, a neutral one will be more practical. Searching through various baby name sites can help with finding particular types of names that you are looking for. I personally found Rowan while browsing neutral names on a site called nameberry.com, which is a pretty cool site because it has a list of names currently being searched in the header, as well as suggested similar names on the pages of names too.
I'm the exact same way. Everything is just so different. It also makes it difficult for me to date. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels this way.
Would anyone here count Jack as a unisex name? I haven't seen it on lists but I have heard it rarely used for girls. It's pretty common but I always liked it.
My IRL name is currently Jack. I hate it, and don't consider it unisex at all. In England, Jack is very masculine. I am not so sure about how it is seen in America. It is also a biblical name (it is derived from John), so that is another bad point for me. But if you like it, don't let me discourage you. (Note that I haven't changed my screen-name because I am not 100% about what my new name should be.)
Just wondering, do you ever feel neither male for female? You haven't mentioned that above, but I mean if you do trigender is also a possibility ^^ Although I do agree that you seem to be fluid to a large extent
I'd say no... I don't really ever feel like neither gender, the closest I've gotten to that is just being both. Also Jack I Think, your not discouraging me, you're entirely entitled to your opinion, so what you said is fine by me. I wouldn't go by the name Jack because of biblical reasons, only because I always liked the name. Like I said before I think, I'm not even sure most people would consider it unisex. Most likely not I think, seeing as I've very rarely heard it used for girls but the point is I have so that's good! I do really, really like the name. What if I told people I don't care which name they call me? So they can call me whichever name they want but that may also be confusing... no I won't do that. I like my birth name, but I think I'd rather go by Jack. Would it be weird to have a possibly "masculine" name and be both a girl and a guy? Is that bad?
You can use whatever name feels comfortable, regardless of your identity. I personally prefer my chosen name (Jesse) even on days I don't ID as male, so we're in the same boat.
It's not bad to go by a masculine name if that is what you want. And my opinion is slightly skewed by my situation, so it could be worth disregarding it.
Wow! Well what used to be Jack I Think is now Hazel!? Is that what your chosen name is? If so that's great!
