Not being able to sleep last night I found myself laying awake thinking over somethings. One of which was how I went from saying "If I transition" to "When I transition". I feel confident that this is the path I will take and for that I feel I am taking a step towards a happier me. I still have my doubts and worries that I am not trans enough, but I am coming to realize that these seem to be pretty normal, especially when considering such a major change. I think I would be more worried about this decision if I had no doubts at all. Then I think of the medical side of things...and their cost. I was aware from the start that my insurance would most likely not cover this. Technically it is my mom's insurance, which I will come off of when I hit the age of 25, and I have no idea how to go about getting my own. At 23 I am jobless, not for a lack of trying, I just live in a small town where jobs are limited, and there is only one car to get 5 people back and forth to work. Even before coming to terms with the fact that I would transition I had a plan for the future. ~My mom offered me to by me a new laptop, one that cost $800. of course I would have to work around the house for it. As a joke I threw the idea of me getting a breast reduction at her. This was before I came out as trans to her. Surprisingly she actually said we could do that. Considering how large these horrible lumps of fat are my insurance would likely cover the procedure, leaving us only to pay $1500 (which is still a lot of money). I was looking forward to this as it would mean that wearing a binder would be so much easier. ~I had also planned to go back to the Technical College around here to get a Certificate in Applied Science with a major in Office Support or Certificate in Applied Science with a major in Early Childhood Dev. Both are year long problems, and my Pell Grant should cover it all. Being trans, out and honest about it, I don't know how bright a career in child care would look. If my college offered a vet tech program I would of went with that but it doesn't. ~While doing that I planned on working part time (if I can find a job and a ride) to save up so that I can move to the wonderful city of Charleston. ~Now that I am out to myself and my mother about being transgender I don't know what kind of kinks this throws in my plans. I really want to find a gender therapist and start on HRT as soon as possibly, but both cost $$$. I would also need to tell the rest of my family. ~I have no idea how to fill out forms now, do I put male, should I tell future employers that I am trans even though I am have not started transitioning yet. Just so many questions. and I always come back to money. ~I don't know where to find a gender therapist. I know there are online ones but I'm nervous about such a thing and would much rather find one where I live. I doubt my tow or the neighboring city has one though. I also don't know how much that would cost. I don't know how much testosterone cost or how much it will cost to go see the doctor for that. ~I'm guessing top surgery is around $8,000 to $15,000 (if ManSculpture is done at same time, which seems like a great idea to me since I have a lot of cellulite/extra flappy skin from rapid weight lost a few years back). That is a hell of a lot of money ~And bottom surgery.....Okay, originally I said I wasn't going to get this. I didn't feel I needed it, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I wouldn't feel completely whole with out...but then, and I admit this hesitantly because I might get blown up about it, I thought it would mean I would have a very small dick. I have since learned that it is all up to which surgery you get. and that made the idea a little more alluring...and then the price...sticker shock....I am still convinced that the site I got the information from had to be wrong. it said something like $80,000.... I'm kinda looking at how much it all cost, and where I am right now in life..and...and I don't know..I know this is a slow process but I want to start as soon as possible. My mom has made it clear that while she supports me she will not help me out financially, which I don't blame her. This is something I am doing for me and I want to do it as much as I can by myself. I'm not sure if she'll cover the breast reduction anymore since she now knows why I actually want one, if not I will try using a binder on these DDs. I feel like I'm thinking myself into a depression. I have no idea where to start or how to start. Its all a little over whelming, but I don't want it to intimidate me into doing nothing. Online community help ;-;
I do the same thing. I think it is normal to think this much about it, it is a big decision after all. You don't have to worry about this all at once though, there are fairly strict standards of care that you need to go through, and they are there for a reason. The first thing you should be thinking about is getting a gender therapist. You'll have a while to talk through any doubts or concerns with them. Then it took me a little over a school semester to get approved for T (Which is where I currently am in this process). I was actually fairly surprised that HRT is not very expensive at all. My therapist said it's about 100$ for a two month supply. I was expecting it to be more. The surgeries cost varies depending on the surgeon you go to. They will be incredibly expensive in some place like L.A. California, but they can be somewhat cheaper else where. So I guess just start looking at the various pricing doctors near you have? Since you have to wait a year after starting testosterone to get surgery, there is some time you have to start saving. Your worries about college and career's are very real though. My job receives government funding, so they can't legally fire me because of my gender identity, but I would look into the laws in your area and the company non-discrimination codes. If you can, try to find a company that protects you. Of course, worse comes to worse you could always not mention this at your workplace, and keep searching for a more desirable work environment elsewhere if you really need the money. I know it is upsetting, but sometimes you need to do undesirable things to get through a rough patch. I'm glad your insurance will help you out! It's the darnedest thing, my therapist told me that most insurances wouldn't cover it, but then my psychology professor told me that because GID is still classified as a psychological disorder, if you are clinically diagnosed with it then insurance should cover sexual reassignment surgeries. ---------- Post added 21st Apr 2015 at 04:30 PM ---------- I just looked up my insurance's policies on this. They partially cover the surgeries, but not the HRT. For some reason I find that strange.
I looked up a list of insurance companies that cover it and CIGNA was on there, so I looked up what their policy says and found this Coverage Policy Gender reassignment surgery (including, but not limited to, related services such as medical counseling, psychological clearance for surgery in the absence of a need for behavioral health therapeutic services, and pre and post-surgical hormonal therapy) is specifically excluded under many health benefit plans. In addition, procedures associated with gender reassignment surgery that are performed solely for the purpose of improving or altering appearance or self-esteem, or to treat psychological symptomatology or psychosocial complaints related to one’s appearance are considered cosmetic in nature and not medically necessary and are not covered under many benefit plans. Please refer to the applicable benefit plan document to determine benefit availability and the terms, conditions and limitations of coverage. If coverage for gender reassignment surgery is available, the following conditions of coverage apply. Cigna covers the following gender reassignment surgery, including pre- and post-surgical hormone therapy, as medically necessary when the individual is age 18 or older, has confirmed gender dysphoria, and is an active participant in a recognized gender identity treatment program: • Female-to-male gender reassignment breast surgery (i.e., initial mastectomy, breast reduction) when there is one letter of support from a qualified mental health professional hysterectomy and salpingo-oophorectomy when BOTH of the following additional criteria are met: o documentation of at least 12 months of continuous hormonal* sex reassignment therapy o recommendation for sex reassignment surgery (i.e., genital surgery) by two qualified mental health professionals with written documentation submitted to the physician performing the genital surgery (At least one letter should be a comprehensive report. Two separate letters or one letter with two signatures is acceptable. One letter from a Master’s degree mental health professional is acceptable if the second letter is from a psychiatrist or Ph.D. clinical psychologist) vaginectomy (including colpectomy, metoidioplasty with initial phalloplasty, urethroplasty, urethromeatoplasty) when ALL of the following criteria are met: o documentation of at least 12 months of continuous hormonal* sex reassignment therapy (May be simultaneous with real life experience.) o the individual has lived within the desired gender role for at least 12 continuous months and which includes a wide range of life experiences and events (e.g., family events, holidays, vacations, season-specific work or school experiences), including notification to partners, family, friends, and community members (e.g., at school, work, other settings) of their identified gender o recommendation for sex reassignment surgery (i.e., genital surgery) by two qualified mental health professionals with written documentation submitted to the physician performing the genital surgery (At least one letter should be a comprehensive report. Two separate letters or one letter with two signatures is acceptable. One letter from a Master’s degree mental health professional is acceptable if the second letter is from a psychiatrist or Ph.D. clinical psychologist.) so i feel kind of hopeful For now I'll work on getting a job and going to school, while looking for a therapist. I need to step back and take things one step at a time I guess thanks for stopping by
And I was talking to my brother about it (I'm not out to him but we do talk about a lot of LGBT stuff) and I brought up how CIGNA covers SRS, and he said that if we had the more expensive (like manager level CIGNA since they get it through their work) it would cover it, but the our regular employee CIGNA won't :/ but to be honest I'm not sure how much he actually knows about any of this.
Looks like you're off to a good start! Yes, one step at a time is best. It's overwhelming to not even be at A and thinking about taking on the whole alphabet. I mean, sure, it's good to look at the whole process but this is a journey. It takes time. I don't think you really need a "gender" therapist. Just a good therapist. So someone who will help you work through things, listens and you mesh well with. Obviously, someone who is open to you transitioning. A good therapist will be all that (though the meshing part can be variable of course). Some therapists will even do a free intro session, some will do sliding scales.
I don't really have any skills that would let me do that. It would require a job that covers me moving to a new state, and that usually requires some form of four year college degree.
