I'm trans. I came out to my parents. They've said they don't believe that's me, and basically ignore it. A couple weeks ago, I exploded when it was trivialized into "nothing" and was nearly thrown out of the house because of it. I started crying today because my stepdad used male pronouns five hundred times in a conversation we were having about a different issue (which I was already stressed out over, as it was making me very late for school). Despite having told them I'm a woman, they don't believe it. And now that I know they know, every time they say 'dude' 'sir' or refer to me as 'a growing young man' I get more and more upset. Am I just... taking it too personally? I don't want to hate them, but... I'm already snappy about it. I have a hair trigger now, and... I hate feeling so angry when they probably don't even entirely understand just how much I hate the way they talk about me. The way my problems are referred to as "nothing" or just "being confused." I'm so emotional right now... earlier, I went looking for a knife, so I could... I don't know. But it scared me, and I instead resorted to writing everything I could down, until I got the phone call that just broke me inside. I'm supposed to go to school eventually, but I don't think I can handle being around people anymore today... what do I do..?
My parents are the same way. It's hard not to want their acceptance, at least in my experience, but I am trying to train myself not to need it. I have met friends who I can share everything with and be myself with. Friends are the family you can choose for yourself. I don't know if this is "good" advice or not, but I've stopped sharing most things with my parents because I know it is futile. They are just too old-fashioned and they either say that I'm mentally ill, or do a passive aggressive "we must have done something wrong when you were a child, if you turned out this way". Don't hate yourself because they can't accept you, that is their shortcoming - not yours. It was brave of you to tell them. Now all you can do is be your beautiful self. They might come around, or they might not, but try not to let it get you down. If they can't give you the support you need, seek it elsewhere.
