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Questioning (again)

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by HiImSkittles, May 7, 2015.

  1. HiImSkittles

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2015
    Messages:
    3
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    Location:
    Sinnoh
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Ok so I've already asked this before but I don't think I really gave enough information and stuff has changed since last time. So here we go.
    Since I was young, I guess I was kind of a girly girl. I wore princess dresses and pink and played with dolls. I don't really remember any of my early years and I only know this because of photos. So, for as long as I remember I've been a tomboy but slightly girly. I've wanted friends that were guys to share interests with and stuff. Though, I'm happy with the friends I have now since they're all into the stuff I like. I would wear girl's clothes sometimes but usually just wanted to wear my hoodies and jeans. More recently, I started refusing to wear dresses and girly things but now it's more of an on and off thing. Sometimes I wanna wear pink poofy dresses and sometimes baggy hoodies and jeans. Sometimes I wanna be this cute, beautiful girl and sometimes I just wanna be a guy and live a life like one. Sometimes I think being a guy is better, sometimes I just don't care. Sometimes I really hate my body. All the curves; they're just so annoying. Ever since I started getting a bigger chest, I just wanted it flat. Sometimes, I just don't care. I guess my personality has kinda split into masculine and feminine sides. I also wanna cut my hair short. I've been growing it long for over three years but now I have a strong masculine side and strong feminine instead of sort of a mix of both, I really wanna cut it. Not super short like a pixie cut, just kinda above shoulder length. So I could look like a girl sometimes, but style it like a medium sort of messy boy look other times. This is getting really long. Wow. XD So, I'm thinking I'm gender fluid, but not entirely sure. If you have anymore questions or an answer, I might not reply for a while since it's almost 1 a.m. here XD I've been really annoyed and confused about this all and I just wanna know the answers. Well, thanks a lot for reading and have a nice day~ (!)
     
  2. jay777

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2014
    Messages:
    1,599
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    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    In summary, being trans is a spectrum. There is no only one right way, and its up to you where you feel comfortable.
    I'd say go with a feeling of joy.

    Its a step by step process, so I'd say take the time you need, but keep at it.
    Just take the next step, and see where it takes you.

    Questions to ask could be:
    would you like a bit more male body to be a bit more happy?
    And you don't have to identify as man all of the time.

    How would you like to be perceived ?

    You have answered some of those questions already.
    You might start with easy reversible steps, like changes to hair and clothing style.

    If you want you might look up a brochure called "doh-transgender-experiences.pdf" . Only thing I would disagree with is page 7, where they state stress, instead many experience relief.
    It states its not a light hearted decision but how people feel, and there are many feeling this way. Its nobodys fault, neither theirs nor that of their upbringing.


    Addditionally you might think about a gender therapist at some point, if you feel you would like to change... not a gatekeeper but a supportive person... to help you along the way.


    have a (*hug*)