I have asked my mother multiple times about getting a haircut, but she says no every time, or she'll ask me why. I want to tell her truth, and say it's so I can pass as a male and start transitioning socially, but I whenever I bring up that topic she gets sad and stops talking. So I end up saying because I don't like my long hair, which is sort of the truth. I'm not sure what to do, this haircut would mean a lot to me and would be a huge step for me, I'd be happier. My dysphoria wouldn't be that bad and I'd be in a better mood. How should I approach this situation with my mom?
How old are you? Is there a possibility of just, simply, getting your hair cut by yourself, with your own money?
Do you have money of your own? If so, just take a bus to town and get a haircut. If your mom is that unsupportive, then why go with her? Obviously, she could get mad, but it's not like you'd be in any danger. Loads of people get their hair cut against their parents wishes. Your mom probably did herself. And if you are paying, then just ask for what you want. Awww, Chip ninja'd me. I'll leave this here, though...
It sounds like she just wants to have her "little girl" kind of situation. My mom got upset when I said I wanted my hair cut but I just stressed that it's what I wanted and you just gotta do what makes you happy. Your life, your hair. Maybe remind her it grows back but that doesn't mean you need to have your hair grow out long again.
It took my mum some real convincing before I was able to get my hair done. You really need to emphasise what the problem is with it and how much it would help you. Afterall, it's just a haircut.
I agree with the others, I think yoy should just do what makes you happy, abd the change in appearabce could actually prove to shiw your mother that this is who you are and make her accept you as male rather rhan a female...Sorry for typos, its late and Im cobfused about my own gender atm... xD Good luck!!
Yeah, hair is hair. It will grow back if you don't like it and that's something you can remind your mom. Hell, I made the excuse that I made when I got my hair cut super short was that it would be easier to maintain since long hair can be a real hassle; especially if it's thick.
Thanks for replying Chip, but I am only 13 and if I were to get my haircut without my parent's permission she would murder me. ---------- Post added 31st May 2015 at 02:32 PM ---------- I have my own money, it's just my parents are super strict.
You can only 'get killed' once. After all the shouting... What are they going to do exactly? You are the one carrying around that hair. It's your right to get rid of it, if it doesn't suit you for whatever reason. I don't know the difference between 'strict' and controlling. I got my first haircut as I was 5, and I got it just by going to the bathroom, grabbing the scissors and cutting until I thought it looked decent. Of course they were horrified and I got 'murdered', but I've been getting killed on a regular basis, and after a while you just get used to it. You can stand up for yourself and get murdered, or you can keep quiet and by that murder yourself. It's up to you, regardless of age.
I just started doing it myself. You can find an $11 home haircut kit at walmart. Not the best advice, but you get what you want. There is no avoiding making her sad I think they will always be sad until they really come to grips with it and maybe not even then. Idk even if my parents do get upset I'd rather them be upset with the person I am rather than content with someone I'm not.