Hey. I don't know how to start since I don't know what is happening. I was born a female and I have always identified as a female. But sometimes when I was a kid I felt like I wanted to be a boy and I would be more comfortable if I was a boy. I sometimes acted like I was a boy when I was alone. This keeps happening nowadays. I like being in this body most part of the time, but I love male clothes, and when I wear them I feel like something is wrong. Not my clothes but my boobs and long hair. I don't feel "right". Some days I feel like acting more "manly". To be honest I have a very rude way of talking. But it's not that. I mean the way I face life. Some days I wear sexy clothes and dresses and stuff and I feel pretty and fine. But when I wear male t-shirts and sneakers I feel different. Like I'm not the same person. And I don't have the same thoughts. But I always identify myself as female. I like being a girl but I would be delighted if I wake up tomorrow being a boy. But I still identify as female. Boys have always seen me as any other friend and they don't usually like me. And I have to say I'm not ugly at all. But I like boys. I haven't defined my sexuality yet but I prefer boys. And I feel so jealous when I see a gay couple. I would love to be a boy and date a boy. But I like being a girl and liking boys. I'm confused. I don't exactly know what do I expect from posting this. If you have experienced/are experiencing something like this and you think you can help please tell me. It's been so difficult writing this because I'm just starting to think about it. (Sorry for my English)
If you see yourself as a girl, but also like the idea of yourself as a boy, you might be bigender. The important thing is finding a way for you to comfortably express your feelings. Sometimes a different mode of self-presentation is the first step to take. This is definitely something you should do some research on, the experience of what it's like to be bigender—it could give you some perspective on what you might be feeling.
