Work etc etc etc

There's nothing wrong with ranting, and it's understandable to be feeling frustration about your situation. Especially when you're feeling alone. I'm sorry that your boss is giving your trouble about your transition, but is it something you could get stopped by contacting HR?

The important thing to remember here is that as long as no one is stopped, they'll continue what they're doing. With that in mind, although it's scary, correcting people about your gender steadily solidifies your gender to yourself and them, helps you feel better about your workplace, and keeps you from feeling bad when you're misgendered. They won't learn or take you seriously unless you take it seriously with them (not to say you aren't, but it'll come across much more important if you're correcting them)

Anyway, I'm sorry things aren't going so well in your workplace, but ranting is okay. Things are bound to improve. It's easier to be courageous when you do small courageous things over and over again. Start with correcting one person on your pronouns. Then two. And it'll get easier to remind them.

I hope things get better!

 

I recently found a compromise which even if it's far from perfect, it works for me.

There is three major 'blocks' about social dysphoria, at least for me : How they act with you because of your gender, the pronouns and the name they use when talking to you.

Humans are visual. If their brain don't see clearly 'man', they'll have a hell of a time saying 'man' when seeing you. This is a fact. If you try with the bruteforce technique, you might only get frustration in return. However if you show them that you are a man by your actions, the way you talk and so on... They will stop treating you like something you are not, even if their brains see something else. You'll become somehow de-sexualized. How they treat you depends on how you react to certain topics. I have no idea about women, but men tend to be accepting if you prove you mean it.

About pronouns... I don't know about you, but my looks are way too androgynous to go past the word 'boy' or (the days I'm lucky) 'young man'. You can try, but there is no magical formula here. Me, I'm a stubborn bastard and I'm always looking for the perfect moment to strike back, the moment when I know they are listening, usually when I'm talking in private to someone and I hint very carefully at it. Most men doesn't need a long speech to get the message. In fact, long speeches and acting emotional are a no-no. Too much information...

The name is right now my achille's heel. I go by it on my private life, but being so hard here to legally change it (officially, which is what matters) prevents me to use it on my job. So everytime I hear another name I have to deal with this sensation of irreality, which has been there for all my life, but could never get used to it.

The good news is that as long as your voice drops, they'll have it easier and you won't need to make your point every five minutes. Until that day... Keep trying, but be ready for the frustration.

 

It may be worth talking to HR about how they are treating you. This is clearly a problem that needs to be handeld. I wouldn't correct customers, but I would correct your coworkers. A simple "please call me this and I go by male pronouns" works well usually.