EDIT: This thread is not about me! Somehow I hate the name of this thread... First of all: These are just some philosophical thoughts I had. I'm not trying to prove anything or so, just some thoughts. It will be flawed and limited in scope and 'accuracy'. I've been thinking a bit about gender identity, innate gender and gender expression and how they are sometimes connected lately. Bear with me if you find such things interesting, my thoughts will be a bit jumbled, no doubt. Innate gender is what you feel you are inside. It's beyond words. Some people don't know what their innate gender is, they don't have that connection, which causes confusion, and can also contribute to dysphoria. Gender expression is how you communicate your gender. Thus, if a cis butch woman (gay or not) wears guy-ish clothes or cool baseball caps or whatever, that is simply style/their taste in clothes/whatever, not gender expression, following that definition. Gender expression is skewed by many things. For example, when I wear female clothes, I am expressing my innate gender. However, when I am wearing male clothes (the horror...), I am still, I would say, expressing my gender (trans female). I don't like it obviously, but trans female is my gender identity and I am expressing it (unwillingly) by being female innately but not wearing the appropriate clothes. Thus, the "trans" part. Gender identity... is more or less what you call yourself, right? A few months ago I went through non-binary gender identities that never felt quite right and now my gender identity is trans female. It is not always as simple as that, however. Identities can be kept to themselves. I always considered myself more girl than guy (transfeminine) even when I was little. Thus, my personal, instinctive gender identity was transfeminine/trans female; but I still called myself male, because that's what I were taught to do. So I guess what I'm saying is... how is gender identity arrived at? For me, identifying as non-binary was a compensatory middle ground. I still mostly presented as male but I needed to express my inner self so I picked something in the middle that allowed me to express myself a bit more. This is not a general rule. For me personally, being non-binary didn't fit at all in the end. Gender identity carries most potential when it is closest to the source, closest to the person's innate gender, e.g. a person is deep down transmasculine and chooses to call themselves/himself transmasculine. Gender expression can help in finding your innate gender and thus to establish a stable gender identity. yeah, just some jumbled thoughts, if you have any comments or if it sparked any independent thoughts in anyone, do share if you want to if I've offended anyone, please say so, and I'm sorry. for all you out there struggling with gender identity: hang in there!! you'll get there. (*hug*)
Just to make sure I understand, innate gender is what you really are, and gender identity is the label you use? I used to identify as agender for a while, but it was never really right. For me I think it was just easier to tell myself I was just agender because it felt like a "safer" option than trans male (not trying to impy being agender is easy, that's just the way I felt at the time). I also felt like I wasn't masculine enough to identify as male because I heard so much misinformation about what being transgender was.
you covered it up good. I at first felt gender fluid, but then later in life I realize that I was trans and I also learn that I don't have to hate every little thing that's for girls to be trans.
If I go by what you're saying, I really have no clue what my innate gender is. Of course, right now I don't really have a gender identity either, so that's fair enough. I guess for me I'm using different expressions to try to figure out what feels best for me- which most of the time is more masculine clothes/behaviors. But I'm still unsure of myself. I really liked how you acknowledged that some people don't automatically know, because it seems to me that most people do and that's been bugging me.
I went through a whole host of non binary genders. I was to feminine to be male but to masculine to female, and at times I felt like neither. I went from gender fluid to masculine a gender. No matter what I seemed to be looking for something male enough to transition. Finally I have just chosen transmasculine. Spent most my life presenting in a neutral way as I wasn't fond of girlly clothes, but wearing male clothing would get me picked on. I know people say gender expression and gender identity aren't relayed by for me they are. And Xander, I've actually notices that people don't actually know their gender at first. That's why they go through so many labels.
I guess for me it's that all my IRL friends always say something along the lines of 'I knew I was a boy/a girl/ different since I was a little kid' and I'm just like.. I didn't know gender was even a thing as a little kid really.
I didn't know what gender was as a kid either. My gender stupid days. I think when people say they knee since they were a kid I think when they look back now they can see it and know. Now that I look back I can see it too, but I didn't always know
You can't really compare yourself to other people too much. You have your needs and your experiences. They have theirs. When I was a kid I knew certain things were set aside for girls, and when I did those things it made me feel better. That might not have been you and that's cool. Doesn't make you more or less trans now.
I think it is a decent overview. Gender is just so confusing that very few people could cover it at all. I identify as a non-binary trans female, so my gender is outside the binary but rooted in the female gender, so even just saying my gender is confusing.
yes, that would be it :3 mm me too. ---------- Post added 27th Jun 2015 at 04:01 PM ---------- Exactly. Gender roles and gender are apart. ---------- Post added 27th Jun 2015 at 04:03 PM ---------- You don't have to know. It's okay for it to take time.
