I don't know what's going on with me. I've been questioning my gender identity for a long time now and I don't know anything. some days I'm fine with who I am, female and dressing like a guy, boyish haircut and just being a boyish girl. But then there are nights like tonight when I'm in bed and I can't sleep because I know I'm not a girl but I have no clue what I am. I lay here hating my body and everything about me that makes me female and nothing makes me feel better. I'm not a guy though either. I feel like I can't be a guy and even if I could it wouldn't feel right. so I look up gender identities that are somewhere in the middle but I don't understand any of those either. I wish I could have some kind of idea about what I am because all I see myself as right now is a freak.
Gender is a spectrum, my friend. A confusing one, but a spectrum nonetheless. And you don't necessarily have just one point on that spectrum, you could be in multiple spots. Or constantly moving. I know it can be confusing and difficult to feel comfortable with yourself when you're not sure what you feel. Especially when that pain of feeling uncomfortable in your own skin gets bad. But take your time, ask yourself questions. Figure out what makes you comfortable. And maybe find an identity you agree with along the way. The most important person in your life is you. So it's a good idea to set aside some time to work through this with yourself. Especially if your happiness is dependent on how you identify. It'll take some work. And some patience. But you can get there. I don't know if this was helpful or anything. But I hope it was. And I hope you know that you have support here on EC around every corner. If you ever need to talk, feel free to leave a message on my wall. I hope things get a little easier for you. And you figure out where you stand.
Agreed, take time to build your own thoughts on the matter. I would add on my opinion but i'm no psychologist. There's nothing wrong with being in the middle or being agender at all, the worlds not just full of binary guys and gals.
thanks guys. I have a tendency to drive myself crazy late at night. thank you for your support and suggestions. I really appreciate it.
