Calling All Agender Babes! (I have gender questions)

So a little while ago I made a thread seeking help with my gender identity. I thought I had found the answer and that androgyne was a good fit. I have both a mix of masculinity and femininity in my personality and behavior...but doesn't the majority? you can be a feminine male or masculine female and still identify as cis right? so my question is, can I be masculine and feminine and identify as nothing? I experience masculine and feminine energy depending on how I feel mentally and emotionally atm. internally I don't link that to a specified gender. I just recognize it as changeable energy. the majority of the time i experience a neutral state. it's almost close to nothing, but something. it's like a blank state, but something is there...but I don't think that it's a gender. I think it's just my being? I don't feel like I'm a mixture of a man and woman. I just feel like a person who does/likes masculine and feminine things? does man have to = masculine and woman = feminine? I feel like a walking genderless yin-yang. nonbinary is the best I've got so far lol. but I wanted to ask you beautiful people how you experience being agender? I've read online definitions...but personal and internal experiences are different from that. plus there's soooo many different ones lol. I would love to hear from you all!

 

you told me this in my last thread and I should have just listened lmao! I thought because I experienced whatl dubbed as "masculine" & "feminine" that I had to link that to a gender. now I know thank you so much for being amazing!

thank you soooo much for sharing your story! it helped a lot. I feel extremely similar to you. I just don't experience body dysphoria as much. but I don't look at myself as being apart of a binary. when I do masculine or feminine things I dont link that to me being a man or a woman or even a mix. I look at it as, me being me. I know I'm not either of them because I see the difference between me and those two genders. Nor do I want to be either or even in between. it feels repressive. which makes me feel like I don't fit anywhere sometimes :\ I do things that both of those genders do...but not because I feel like I'm one of them. it's just in my behavior. when I took on androgyne, over time it just made my internally feel like I was putting on another mask. like I had to act femme & masculine all the time. or that I had to act like one of the other in certain moments...but that's not me. it makes me feel like I'm trying to be something or to prove something. that's not authentic for me. me doing whatever I want for the sake of my own comfortability and not caring about what gender I'm serving is me lol. before when I expressed femininity or masculinity I didn't link it to gender. I was comfortable with that.

thank for responding & sharing links! they were really helpful. the comics were cool! lol. I feel very mutual to you. I'm neither of them. I'm confident in that for sure. I feel like including any form of binary into my identity represses who I am and it makes me feel like I have to be a certain way...I'm not very fond of that. gender roles (even if it's from an inbetween gender) makes me feel like I have to adhere to something instead of me just asking myself what I want for myself and what I'm comfortable with. I'm masculine and feminine in behavior. but not 100% I take on the traits that I'm comfortable with and what I feel like fits. but not all female traits fit and not all masculine traits fit either. ex: being non emotional does not fit me, neither does being submissive.

your gender is very broad and beautiful for me personally, I never feel like a man. I never feel like a woman. I just feel like I do some of the things that both of those genders do. but I never wake up feeling like either of them. just me. I don't feel like I'm a cross between both genders either becaus i dktn feel like im either if them. I just feel like a person who does/likes masculine and feminine things. I do express those things in a very fluid manner though. just because I don't really care what anyone thinks. it's about what makes me comfortable. wearing a dress, okay. wearing heels or carrying a purse? no. I don't like doing things that make me feel like I'm embodying a gender. I like doing things because they're fun or comfortable lol. hopefully that makes sense. Im just trying to figure of what that means. I guess im curious about the difference between experiencing an "inbetween" state and nothing. I feel like mine is just nothing haha.

you broke it down like Marijuana I didn't even consider that personality & gender don't have to sway together. I always thought who you are redirected back to your personality and I based my gender off of that...this, cleared up a lot. my personality is sprinkled with masculine and feminine characteristics. nonbinary definitely fits. I'm neither a man, woman, or both...I guess im just an agender space alien haha. I don feel like I'm enough of anything to be anything. this makes a lot of sense as to why I always have felt like no one understood me or that I didn't fit anywhere. I always notice the difference between me & everyone else! it makes me feel so alone like I don't have a place for who I am anywhere. like I'm a literal alien in human flesh. I think agender fits. I dont wanna be anything. I just want to be myself. it makes me feel naked and like I'm not hiding behind when I don't take on a gender...which is scary. but, I'm going to stop typing because its making me cry now lol. thank so much for everything! truly.

 

this makes a lot of sense. I personally dress according to my mood. the way that I act usually traces back to how I'm feeling atm or are just my personality traits. that can mean masculine, femme, or both in expression. I know now its not a gender thing, its a feeling thing for me always lol. I guess I confused my expression with my identity. so far I'm comfortable identifying as nonbinary. removing binary labels for me is like coming home and taking your bra off after a long day of caging them lol. it's so relieving. i feel like I can just breath without worry, expectation, or restriction! it's a very nice feeling. agender is snuggly. I can work with this. calling myself agender also doesn't make me feel like I'm trying to be anything. as far I as dysphoria goes, I do know not all agender people experience it. it's just that I do sometimes.

i know i was just agreeing because i feel dysphoria sometimes. like I wish my breast weren't as large and noticeable or that I never got a period. sometimes it bothers me other times it doesnt. I had a melt down when I first got my period and was told that it was apart of "womanhood" and would be with me for the majority of my life lol. I didn't want to become a woman. I didn't want to worry about woman things or man things. I just wanted to play and to have fun. that's how i still am to this day honestly lol. it just wasn't fair to me. growing up I rejected a lot things that made me feel like I was embodying a binary. and if I did, it felt weird or uncomfortable. but now I know why! it's because I was being forced into having a gender when I didn't have one in the first place. *sighs* it's all falling together :lol: thank you so much for all of your insight. thanks so much for sharing with me as well.