I am a 19 year old guy and when I was 4 years old, I used to insist that I was a girl for a short period of time. That passed, but as I got older, I was disinterested with what the boys in school were doing and I fit in with girls more, although I have always hated shopping and never was interested on 'girls' toys. I was always more sensitive than boys my age. I did feel upset when I was a young teenager because my penis size wasn't big enough, so at the time, I didn't want not to have male genitalia. Sometimes I would have the urge to put on make up through the years, but I thought it was weird so I didn't do it. The other day, I put on a pair of women's short shorts and i felt invigorated and confortable. Not just physically comfortable but I felt a little free when I wore them. Later that night, I found a women's short sleeved tee shirt that was obviously made for the female physique. I got out some of my sister's make up and lip stick of a colour I liked and apples them. I honesty enjoyed every moment. I bought a bra at Walmart and put it on under the shirt and stuffed it to give the appearance of breasts and I got a hair tie and fixed my hair to look more feminine. I went for a walk... It was midnight so nobody was outside. I was trying to walk and act in a more feminine way. I am a furry and I created a character that would fit me the most and I feel so much like the character I made is too masculine and to create a female character a great thought and I decided to create a female one, which made me feel more connected to it. Often times, I'll play as a female character in video games because I feel more comfortable doing so. Whenever I think of being in a relationship, I invision myself being cuddled by someone stronger than me and more protective.
Well, some days I feel more female than others, but it's been recently when I felt the urge to express gender in a more feminine way. I just don't understand why I had an interest in guns and air soft when I was younger... Most trans women never enjoyed such things... I took some interest in more feminine things as well more recently, though. I'd also like to point out that I have two disorders which mostly occur in women, like over 90% of the time, like emetophobia, fear of vomiting, which over 95% of sufferers are women, and trichotilomania, the compulsion to pull out ones hair which mainly women have. I also read that trans women have minds that work more similarly to women than to men, and brain scans have evidence that reflect that.
I know all sorts of cis girls who liked guns and air soft when they were kids. Does this make them not girls? Of course not. Trans women can like "boy stuff" too, and it doesn't mean they're not still women. I don't have enough information to know if you are trans or if you are just interested in "women's" clothes, but the fact that you liked guns and air soft as a child certainly shouldn't be the reason you don't think you're trans.
I don't know... There isn't much I can say about myself that would make me distinctly male gendered, like, I don't see the advantage of being male, but I do sometimes wish I were a girl to begin with, because now I look masculine no matter how I try to look otherwise... I do have occasional dysmorphia, I think, mainly that I do wish I had more female physique, i.e. breasts, vagina, and I really do want more female like breasts, but I don't want to get rid of my male genitalia as of this moment, but sometimes it changes... It's just that I never really questioned my gender identity until very recently...
I kinda wish that I were a female, I would feel more like myself, but I would be more tomboyish... I just kind of dislike my masculine features such as my genitalia, Adam's apple, deep voice, and masculine face.
I would have never thought that I'd say this to anyone, but.. Just be yourself. Do you really need to worry about made up labels like "bigender"? Your individuality is infinitely more complex than any of these uninteresting labels.
Personally I find it comforting to find a label that fits me so I can understand why the threadstarter wants to.
It is absolutely possible to figure out your gender at your age. There are people who don't figure it out until they're even much older than you, and they're still trans. They still count. Again, I will say that I can't determine your specific identity but you definitely don't sound cis. Some questions that might allow me to help you out more: 1) do he/him pronouns feel comfortable? Do she/her or they/them pronouns feel comfortable? Does your preference ever change? 2) do you feel uncomfortable being seen as male? Does this ever change? 3) does your internal sense of who you are (male, female, etc.) ever change? If so, do you know between what?
